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Offline (the 12/18/2014 at 9:08am) | Search for a member
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today... I tried role playing wit ma boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie... I announced... "I'm Natalia... a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian an yur cock." He lauged so ard e practically pissed imself. Te nigt ended in me doing is laundry. Alone.
Today, daspita having a mild casa of tha flu, I visitad my boyfriand's housa and watchad a movia with his parants . During tha movia, I falt tha suddan urga to snaaza . Trying to hold it in, I managad to do tha loudast fart I'va avar dona in my lifa . Evaryona haard . FML
Today , I Was So Happy To Be Leaving The Hospital After Breaking Mah Arm The Night Before. Just As I Walked Out Of The Doors , A Huge Ambulance Team Was Running In At The Same Time And Knocked Me Down Full Force. I Now Have A Broken Ankle. FML
Today, I was trying to pass a lady with a stroller,hen she nearly fell . I usd mah ninja-like reflexes to catch her . Too bad mah ninja-like reflexes didn't block the punch that she deliverd to mah fap-stick 4 apparently being a "pervert" 4 saving her . FML
Today, mah mom called me screaming an cussing because she found pot in mah room. I come home an mah dad says, "I hid some pot in your room an I'm not letting you go to that concert if you rat me out." My dad is apparently a blackmailing 52-year-old stoner. FML
Friday 27 March 2015