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bls27

Offline (the 07/04/2015 at 3:28pm) | Search for a member

bls27

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1735
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bls27's page activity

Visits<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:33am<b>shaww</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:32pm<b>1tsmenoah</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:29pm

bls27's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of bls27's badges

bls27's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to stand in line for twenty minutes at the bank, in between two of my ex-boyfriends. FML

#21168070
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49272) - you deserved it (10711)

On 06/09/2014 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I figured I needed to go on a diet when I discovered I could make farting noises with my neck. FML

#21163432
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36255) - you deserved it (16858)

On 06/05/2014 at 12:11am - health - by fat and alone - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich aromas of fecal matter" is not a good subject to use as an ice breaker for making friends. FML

#21161981
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35222) - you deserved it (4312)

On 06/03/2014 at 6:51pm - misc - by Aether - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer told me, "Girls your size can't bend at the waist." I couldn't stop laughing at the imagery long enough to be really offended. FML

#21161933
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36242) - you deserved it (5290)

On 06/03/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by jennythezebra (woman) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48776) - you deserved it (5403)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

#21158187
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44393) - you deserved it (3815)

On 05/31/2014 at 12:39pm - health - by half-dead in CA (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45255) - you deserved it (8483)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

#21158075
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54251) - you deserved it (7399)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:40am - love - by damn it rose (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my wife muttering "God, I want you so bad". Figuring she was either talking to me or longing for the second cumming of Christ, I turned over to see which. Turned out she was rubbing one out to some guy's Facebook photos on her phone. FML

#21157398
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61144) - you deserved it (6738)

On 05/30/2014 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by lahiros (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my psycho, animal-hating neighbour "accidentally" ran over my cat. This is the second time he's "accidentally" done this to a neighbourhood pet since he moved in, three weeks ago. FML

#21157136
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47275) - you deserved it (3531)

On 05/30/2014 at 1:28pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had to take my daughter home from school because she had been caught flashing the boys during class. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't an appropriate way to act or behave but she interrupted me, "Mom, you don't even understand." You're right. I don't. FML

#21146764
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45091) - you deserved it (6317)

On 05/20/2014 at 10:24pm - kids - by HouseWife - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML

#21143037
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47430) - you deserved it (5270)

On 05/17/2014 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML

#21142903
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39734) - you deserved it (6531)

On 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by her mom raised her (man) - Mexico

Today, trying to be nice, I added this really shy kid from my English class on Facebook. Within minutes, he started going through all my pictures and tagging himself as my breasts. FML

#21142867
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47996) - you deserved it (9323)

On 05/17/2014 at 12:54pm - misc - by creepyyy (woman) - United States



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