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bls27

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bls27
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  • Number of visits : 10
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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bls27's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21394) - you deserved it (4320)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

#19239456
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10574) - you deserved it (35202)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my stomach muscles are still sore from yesterday. Not because I was doing sit-ups or working out or anything, but because I have to work that hard to take a dump. FML

#19218183
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13785) - you deserved it (4033)

On 03/05/2012 at 12:12am - health - by wtbfiber (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML

#19211804
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32943) - you deserved it (19747)

On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, my boyfriend decided he is going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML

#19201903
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15742) - you deserved it (2235)

On 03/02/2012 at 10:01am - misc - by types (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML

#19159270
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25629) - you deserved it (5652)

On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML

#19136346
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27028) - you deserved it (3680)

On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29684) - you deserved it (4053)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

#19130391
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19683) - you deserved it (5980)

On 02/21/2012 at 10:33am - health - by mary (woman) - Australia

Today, I set my alarm half-an-hour earlier so I could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am. FML

#19129332
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15650) - you deserved it (16485)

On 02/21/2012 at 3:10am - intimacy - by desperate905 - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, was the fifth night I've dreamed of brushing my teeth. I wake up about three times a night because as I spit in my dream, I actually spit on my face as I'm sleeping. FML

#18995010
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17877) - you deserved it (1911)

On 02/04/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by wetdreams - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I accidentally told my mom to ejaculate the flash drive from the PC. FML

#18976293
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12618) - you deserved it (3129)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - India

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35965) - you deserved it (6093)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML

#17884262
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25041) - you deserved it (2148)

On 10/02/2011 at 2:36am - misc - by Emmy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44832) - you deserved it (1874)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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