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bls27

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bls27

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bls27's page activity

Visits<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:33am<b>shaww</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:32pm<b>1tsmenoah</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:29pm

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bls27's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

#20199177
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35050) - you deserved it (14535)

On 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11865) - you deserved it (27962)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I made a positive remark to the owner of my local groceries store for employing a special needs girl. Not only is the girl not mentally handicapped, she's also the owner's daughter. FML

#20190915
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10130) - you deserved it (27541)

On 12/04/2012 at 1:51pm - misc - by Vassy (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20619) - you deserved it (2899)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20290) - you deserved it (7837)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20290) - you deserved it (7837)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML

#20186465
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41820) - you deserved it (6601)

On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

#20185787
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36075) - you deserved it (3384)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

#20184636
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30911) - you deserved it (8796)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by lizzard0416 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, someone very close to me came out of the closet. Normally I would fully support them, had we not just gotten married. FML

#20181869
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38210) - you deserved it (2396)

On 11/27/2012 at 10:08pm - love - by Bliggins - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was watching a video from the 80s on sexual dysfunctions, and I noticed that one of the boys in the film looked strangely like my dad when he was younger. After a little investigation, I now know that in his youth, my dad had a crippling masturbation problem. FML

#20181345
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40793) - you deserved it (3610)

On 11/27/2012 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML

#20169668
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27267) - you deserved it (5246)

On 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

#20168405
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37957) - you deserved it (5655)

On 11/18/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by besviken (woman) - Sweden (Uppsala Lan)

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML



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