blondeninja1

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Offline (the 09/04/2015 at 10:11pm)

blondeninja1

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 699
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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blondeninja1's page activity

Visits<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:34pm<b>Steve97</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 9:05pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 10:10am<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 5:05pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 11:56am<b>tiger820</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 11:48am<b>ToxicPlant</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 11:58am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 2:34pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 8:53am<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 2:56pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 10:14am<b>Jowisee</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 8:57am<b>alexandra5</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 10:29pm<b>fleckney26</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 10:44am<b>Logicscmogic</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 12:38am<b>rob02</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 7:00am<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:59pm<b>fortune789</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:50pm

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 2:34am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 8:34pm<b>Steve97</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 5:12pm

blondeninja1's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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blondeninja1's favorite FMLs

Today, I met up with an old friend of mine who acts in a TV show. I hadn't seen him in a long time, but I'd been watching episodes of the show almost daily, so when he showed up I could only see him as his TV character and not as my friend. I ended up calling him by his character's name. FML

by Confused / 04/16/2014 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the only female who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

by gerontofuck / 04/15/2014 at 5:55pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2014 at 1:02pm / Canada / Health

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

by dani / 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister brought me coffee to my office. It was really nice so I made a status about it on Facebook. My boyfriend texted me soon after, freaking out because I never put anything on Facebook about him and how great he is. I'm basically dating a 14-year-old girl. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2014 at 6:27pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

by vegas-81 / 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm / France / Intimacy

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

by took it / 02/09/2014 at 9:36am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

by Unknown / 02/07/2014 at 9:18am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

by romance sucks. / 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

by thank god you'll only live once / 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

by Where is the faith in Humanity / 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

by oldshitnewshit / 10/22/2013 at 5:11pm / United States / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous