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blondeninja1

Offline (the 01/08/2015 at 2:25pm) | Search for a member

blondeninja1

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 312
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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blondeninja1's page activity

Visits<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:59pm<b>fortune789</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:20pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 6:02pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 8:32am<b>dk1991</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:46am<b>hare</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:41pm<b>rob02</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 2:12pm<b>ktmla</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:38pm<b>maxface</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:05am<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 10:36am<b>Credibleskills</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 12:34am<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 7:30am<b>A07</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 1:29pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 11:42am<b>woiz</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 1:31pm<b>alicealiveordead</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 1:28pm<b>randomdude54</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 3:12pm

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50 favourites

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This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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blondeninja1's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister brought me coffee to my office. It was really nice so I made a status about it on Facebook. My boyfriend texted me soon after, freaking out because I never put anything on Facebook about him and how great he is. I'm basically dating a 14-year-old girl. FML

#21084209
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39412) - you deserved it (6550)

On 03/11/2014 at 6:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46274) - you deserved it (6784)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

#21055858
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45174) - you deserved it (14708) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm - intimacy - by vegas-81 - France

Today, while playing a big basketball game, I had to run urgently to the bathroom because of a really hard diarrhea. I took the ball. FML

#21055217
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38964) - you deserved it (7487)

On 02/09/2014 at 9:36am - misc - by took it - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were quite drunk while we were fooling around on the couch, when I decided I wanted to lose my virginity to her. I was two thrusts in when she burst out laughing. Looking down, I realized I was between her cheeks and the couch cushion. I lost my virginity to her couch. FML

#21053213
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52553) - you deserved it (18574)

On 02/07/2014 at 9:18am - intimacy - by Unknown - United States (Iowa)

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

#20997138
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44945) - you deserved it (3480)

On 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by romance sucks. (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44384) - you deserved it (3349)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

Today, I was in my room playing with my pet. I told my snake, "Who needs friends when I have you?" Through the wall I heard my neighbors say, "You do." I've never met my neighbors. FML

#20949324
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39455) - you deserved it (8013)

On 11/07/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by Where is the faith in Humanity - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
334 comments

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76230) - you deserved it (3708)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47458) - you deserved it (19040)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML

#20727770
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58453) - you deserved it (9175)

On 06/15/2013 at 4:26pm - intimacy - by woof woof?? (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML

#20694473
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53604) - you deserved it (9008)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML



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