This member hasn't filled in the description.
Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14493) - you totally deserved it (37036)
On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a call from my parents' divorce lawyer. When I answered the phone, she thought I was my mother and told me the details about my parent's divorce. I'm a 13-year-old boy who sounds like a woman and just learned that my parents are separating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42872) - you totally deserved it (1615)
On 08/07/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by madaskueuchiha (man) - United States (Florida)
Today my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38835) - you totally deserved it (6130)
On 07/04/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Cococautly (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46621) - you totally deserved it (6044)
On 06/25/2009 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I had a hour long conversation with someone I apparently was friends with a few years ago. I couldn't remember who he was for the life of me, so I just played along. Finally, I told him I didn't remember him. He had the wrong number. I had a long conversation with a wrong number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9454) - you totally deserved it (31733)
On 05/11/2009 at 12:46am - misc - by lostintellct (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67784) - you totally deserved it (25111)
On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14324) - you totally deserved it (26845)
On 02/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by RosaP (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidently texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiance, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19925) - you totally deserved it (27204)
On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my mom took me to the doctor for my annual physical. Puberty still hasn't arrived, and the doctor seems concerned. Then he leaves the room, and leaves the door ajar. I overhear him discussing my undeveloped penis with my mom, and brings her in to show her 'the problem'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53707) - you totally deserved it (2275)
On 02/14/2009 at 12:13pm - misc - by nightfly - United States (New Jersey)
Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33845) - you totally deserved it (4394)
On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)
Today, I went into a shop, not really completely awake. To get to the upper floor, I took the escalator... in the wrong direction. After about 30 seconds (which seemed like hours) trying to climb up the wrong way, my brain started working and by that time I already had a few amused spectators watching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5385) - you totally deserved it (2922)
On 01/07/2009 at 12:53am - misc - by maaaryy - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4743) - you totally deserved it (29678)
On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - France (Ile-de-France)
[ Page : 1 ]
« Previous page | Next page »
