About blink_kid : AKA Jen. I like VW campervans, dreamcatchers, underwear, good spelling and saving the world :)
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blink_kid's favorite FMLs
Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML
by ToxxicAngel / 11/27/2012 at 10:35am / United Kingdom (Monmouthshire) / Love
Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML
by Cracky / 11/27/2012 at 9:32am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by I'm stupid / 11/25/2012 at 10:08am / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I told my boss that I quit, and handed in my two week's notice. A couple of hours later, I found my letter of resignation had been photocopied and copies hung all around the office with "Best day ever" written on the bottom. FML
by sad face / 11/24/2012 at 6:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML
by notAMrs / 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
by mm / 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United Kingdom (Warrington) / Miscellaneous
by pheebs314 / 11/07/2012 at 4:16pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by ThisisMedSchool / 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Medic / 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm / United States (Washington) / Work
Today, I tried to do my leaf collection project for biology, which ended with me being hospitalized because of an allergy attack. I have no idea what I'm allergic to, but my doctor says I should just assume I'm "allergic to all leaves, ever." FML
by leaftheerickson / 10/21/2012 at 6:31am / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/12/2012 at 7:39pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML
by assholecat / 10/10/2012 at 4:43am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…
- Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back… Today, I finally found out whether or not my boyfriend is cheating on me. Turns out he isn't. He is… Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear.…