About blink_kid : AKA Jen. I like VW campervans, dreamcatchers, underwear, good spelling and saving the world :)
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blink_kid's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/29/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I rushed home during a torrential downpour. When I got back, I went to take a pee and took off my wet socks while I had the chance. Once I finished, I stood up with used toilet paper in one hand and wet socks in the other. Guess which I tossed into the toilet. FML
by blabla / 10/28/2011 at 9:30am / Brazil / Miscellaneous
Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML
by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 1:43am / United States (Minnesota) / Animals
by titoutou222 / 10/22/2011 at 8:40am / France / Kids
Today, I went to the doctor for a physical. I've been sitting in the doctor's bathroom for 10 minutes now, trying to think of how to tell him I accidentally tripped and spilled my urine sample on the carpet. FML
by socal000 / 10/20/2011 at 8:04am / United States / Health
by spoiled22 / 10/12/2011 at 3:17am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by lollymay13 / 10/11/2011 at 11:22am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
by jzappe / 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
by maniac11 / 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, my sister asked me to explain where to put a tampon. I realized near the end of the conversation that she believed the urine, feces, and blood all came from the same orifice. This began a long discussion during which I was forced to tell her not to put the tampon in her rectum. FML
by ohgawd / 10/08/2011 at 2:48am / United States (Washington) / Health
by knzknz / 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by katt_is_here / 10/02/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Colorado) / Work
Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML
by Unluckiest Guy of the group / 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
by Anonymous / 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm / United States / Work
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…