About blink_kid : AKA Jen. I like VW campervans, dreamcatchers, underwear, good spelling and saving the world :)
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26247) - you deserved it (10458)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27265) - you deserved it (2047)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:22am - kids - by Gross... (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, a downstairs neighbor of mine claimed money from me because apparently my dog took a dump on the fire escape, and the poop fell through the grates and on her groceries. I don't have a dog, but I paid the money anyway, because I was too ashamed to tell her it was my husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31917) - you deserved it (7390)
On 08/09/2011 at 6:55pm - animals - by Zoe Avila - United States
Today, I was peeing, and I sneezed. I looked down to see that my gum had flown out of my mouth and gotten caught in my pubes. On the upside I got a new look. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15905) - you deserved it (6515)
On 08/06/2011 at 1:15am - misc - by en3rg1zer21 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43422) - you deserved it (7603)
On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I couldn't shut a drawer in my kitchen, because an oven mitt was blocking it. An oven mitt filled with tin-foil wrapped electronics. My Mom believes Internet hackers can get into her digital camera and prepaid cell phone, and apparently tin-foil will prevent that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18604) - you deserved it (1620)
On 07/14/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by BelleCharmante (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went into hospital for knee surgery. When I awoke, I was surprised to find a bandage wrapped around my throbbing head. The nurse explained that a student observer had fainted in the operating room and his head had smashed against mine on the way down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33699) - you deserved it (1997) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/08/2011 at 11:46am - health - by Anonymous - Belgium (Liege)
Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24612) - you deserved it (4474)
On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States
Today, my mother insisted I thoroughly water all the plants in and around my house before some people turned up. This would be fine except 90% of them are fake. She is convinced it will make them look "realer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21943) - you deserved it (1943)
On 07/05/2011 at 10:32am - misc - by omfgfmlife - United States (Texas)
Today, I finished reading a book about the treatment of mental patients and decided to use some of the strategies on my dad. We've never gotten along better. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26990) - you deserved it (3501)
On 07/04/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Bekah (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10658) - you deserved it (35895)
On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)
Today, my family went and visited my nan. She ushered me in close and asked, "When are you going to knock it off with all this emo cockshite?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11250) - you deserved it (32392)
On 06/04/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by Flarewolf (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48225) - you deserved it (3254)
On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I inexplicably claimed ownership of someone else's fart in the subway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7742) - you deserved it (23463)
Today, I was brushing my teeth. As a bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spit a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19912) - you deserved it (7200)
On 05/13/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by toothpastecat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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