About blink_kid : AKA Jen. I like VW campervans, dreamcatchers, underwear, good spelling and saving the world :)
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blink_kid's favorite FMLs
Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML
by lady parts / 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I have such severe ADD that I can't focus without my medication. When I take the medication, I can only focus on one thing, but not necessarily the thing I need to be focusing on. I have a chem test soon, and I've been vacuuming my room for the past 4 hours. FML
by Anonymous / 09/25/2014 at 3:32pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals
by Anonymous / 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, I served a group of three teens. Their tab was $75 and they tipped me nothing. They wrote a thank you on a piece of receipt paper, put it in a glass of water and used a coaster to turn the glass of water upside down on the table, spilling water everywhere. They also stole my pen. FML
by brerj09 / 04/28/2014 at 9:35am / United States (Minnesota) / Work
Today, I threw an eraser at my brother to get his attention because he couldn't hear me over his music. Being in a bad mood, he thought I was trying to aggravate his bad mood and responded by throwing a small desk cactus back. FML
by ThatGuyWithFMLs / 02/25/2014 at 4:31am / Japan (Osaka) / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML
by BakedBat / 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by :( / 01/27/2014 at 5:31pm / Algeria / Miscellaneous
by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by pootie / 12/11/2013 at 8:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML
by OakStake / 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by eer004 / 12/07/2013 at 5:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals
by TetrisMaster / 11/24/2013 at 7:30am / Australia / Health
by 43_clothespins_later / 11/20/2013 at 7:12pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by ChestExploding / 11/20/2013 at 6:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…
- Today, a young woman on the subway asked me to hold her pocket mirror open in front of her. I asked… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, it was my last day working at my company. The whole staff was summoned to a meeting, but I…