About blazingturtle : "Life aint nothin but bitches and money"-Ice Cube
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blazingturtle's favorite FMLs
by bye loser / 10/20/2014 at 5:28am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids
by watch_corn_dance / 04/07/2014 at 10:13pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 1:38am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I overheard my boyfriend and his friends talking in the next room. I smiled when my boyfriend called me beautiful, only to hear his friend laugh and say, "C'mon, dude. She has fat ankles and smells like deli meat." FML
by sausagefingers / 10/22/2012 at 1:29am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2009 at 7:08am / United States (Washington) / Holidays
Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML
by DangerZone / 11/11/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by civic4life / 09/16/2009 at 11:16pm / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, an extremely large lady came into the dry cleaners where I work. She puts what I assume is a blanket on the counter to be dry cleaned. I said, "So just the one blanket then?" She replied, "Those are my pants, not a blanket." She was a size 56. FML
by Kasizzle / 02/26/2009 at 9:13am / United States (Colorado) / Work
by EpicFail / 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
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