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About blair_x : I prefer to keep personal information about me off of sites where it could be potentially used against me, such as this one. All I will share is that I'm a dancer, I'm 16, and I reside in SoCal.
Most of the comments I post aren't funny, but they sure must've been something if you clicked on my profile. Happy Cr33ping.
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Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6380) - you deserved it (432)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6229) - you deserved it (2797)
On 03/16/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by danny5191 (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I told my mom about an article I'd seen that said people tend to make the most mistakes at 2 to 3 in the morning. Without a trace of humor in her voice, she said, "Tell me about it. You were conceived round about then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18084) - you deserved it (1849)
Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17688) - you deserved it (1667)
On 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm - misc - by rapper in training (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9953) - you deserved it (1154)
On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5888) - you deserved it (1224)
On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6990) - you deserved it (19685)
On 01/23/2012 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27578) - you deserved it (1844)
On 01/21/2012 at 6:59am - misc - by superficialheart - China
Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33151) - you deserved it (2574)
On 01/14/2012 at 2:47am - health - by shitttyyyday - United States
Today, my blanket got caught on my nose ring and it took my boyfriend over an hour to get it free. Afterwards, he admitted he was trying not to laugh because it reminded him of a bullfight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8151) - you deserved it (17036)
On 01/06/2012 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Mexico (Zacatecas)
Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (2117)
On 10/19/2011 at 5:40am - misc - by targe - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44128) - you deserved it (3785)
On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I watched a cat pounce on a small bird and rip it to shreds, feather by feather. It wouldn't have been any worse than mildly disturbing, had I not just spent the last 4 weeks nursing the bird back to health from a broken wing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19837) - you deserved it (1734)
On 09/14/2011 at 7:20pm - animals - by Twitchy (man) - Bahamas (New Providence)
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7421) - you deserved it (2680)
On 09/13/2011 at 2:11am - love - by Penkkis (woman) - Finland (Lapland)
Today, I bought a book by a #1 bestselling author, hoping it would distract me from having my manuscript rejected, as well as learn what made their book so successful. Now I realize I need to say stuff like, "I wish I had great boobs (hehe... boobs)" to get my works published. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15779) - you deserved it (1846)
On 09/08/2011 at 2:03pm - misc - by WishIWasAWriter (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
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