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Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I had to go through the embarrassment and pain of telling my parents I was pregnant. I took the test and it came out positive and I was freaking out. I got grounded for the rest of the year and they're really disappointed in me. Five minutes ago, I got my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45497) - you deserved it (20248)
On 07/11/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my friend and I decided to get bikini waxes. Afterwards, the women who did the waxing told my friend it was $30 for her wax. Then, in front of the whole salon, the women points at me and says, "You! You so hairy- $35!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (47932) - you deserved it (6491)
On 07/11/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by waxinghorror (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance bonus. I was asleep at my desk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7324) - you deserved it (41618)
On 07/10/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by ChrisC (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37424) - you deserved it (14151)
On 07/10/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I heard a student in the class I assist having trouble with a download. I walked over and showed him how to save to his flash drive, and how to use 7z to unzip said file. I then found out I'd just assisted him in downloading a half gig of porn during class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33133) - you deserved it (6838)
On 07/09/2009 at 11:00am - misc - by TingBarter (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47482) - you deserved it (2047)
On 07/09/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by lady_jeni - United States (California)
Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18800) - you deserved it (41530)
On 07/09/2009 at 2:21am - health - by Fattypatty (man) - United States (California)
Today, my cousin told me that the stop signs outlined with a white line were optional. Later, a cop pulled me over, when I asked why he said, "You ran that stop sign back there." I explained what my cousin had told me and he looked at me funny and replied, "All stop signs have a white outline." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8742) - you deserved it (76381)
On 07/08/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5721) - you deserved it (81071)
On 07/08/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by AmberKCole (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower. You're terrible, and everyone in the building can hear you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32843) - you deserved it (12318)
On 07/06/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by WhitneyHouston (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42380) - you deserved it (2786)
On 07/06/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by AidenFromSweden (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I made a bowl of spaghetti for my girlfriend and me. I tried the move from Lady and the Tramp where the boy and girl both slurp the same piece of spagetti and end up kissing. When I tried it, the spagetti went too down far my throat, and I ended up throwing it up on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35411) - you deserved it (19730)
On 07/06/2009 at 12:54pm - love - by spitballer1 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I gave the option to my boyfriend of 5 years to either quit World of Warcraft of lose me. He said WOW makes him happier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43957) - you deserved it (22997)
On 07/06/2009 at 6:51am - love - by dumpedovergame (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in their fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids are 4 and 2. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11293) - you deserved it (39022)
On 07/05/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by smth (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I got a call from my parents that they have decided to get a divorce. My brothers and I just shelled out $5,000 each and spent months planning their 50th Anniversary party that was supposed to be next month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44282) - you deserved it (1918)
On 07/05/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by Annabelle (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 20 May 2013
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