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blackwidowtaco

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blackwidowtaco

3Fucked!

blackwidowtaco
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 May 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4955
  • Number of comments : 477
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About blackwidowtaco : Shit happens.

blackwidowtaco's page activity

Visits<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 12:57am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:05pm<b>rogwest</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 1:30pm<b>i_lik_tomaters</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 1:25am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:26am<b>Ebola</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:30pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ADBurns</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:08pm<b>C7</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:42am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:19am<b>MikeonFML</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:05am<b>AlexanderDavidd</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 8:58am<b>saocrates</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 6:13am<b>Paris25</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:27am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:22am<b>paravoz</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:03am<b>annihil8or</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 1:10am

Fucked!<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 2:28am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 8:41pm<b>XxDanno316xX</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:23pm

blackwidowtaco's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of blackwidowtaco's badges

blackwidowtaco's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that I have been playing a little too much Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. I realized this when I was watching a youtube video and there was someone walking in the background who I impulsively tried to gun down and kill by moving my mouse over him and clicking repeatedly. FML

#7096414
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6924) - you deserved it (34327)

On 01/02/2010 at 1:17am - misc - by Laughluv (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to get my girlfriend of nine months to have oral sex with me. She was eating a hot dog. She then said, "If you ask me again, this is what I'll do to you." She then bit the hot dog in half. FML

#6989105
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9727) - you deserved it (34954)

On 12/28/2009 at 5:16am - intimacy - by Dontworryaboutit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my resume to a place where I hoped to work at. Since the job requires me to be doing work on the run, I put on it that I have a laptop. The only problem is that I always thought it was "labtop." I didn't learn the correct spelling until my daughter called me an idiot, she's 6. FML

#6859638
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4949) - you deserved it (37402)

On 12/21/2009 at 2:04am - work - by eliteslayer29 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42898) - you deserved it (3412)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I fainted and woke up in a hospital. My mom drove me to the emergency room. The doctor said I had a panic attack. What did I have a panic attack from? Bidding on ebay. FML

#6713073
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11155) - you deserved it (28904)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by graospe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

#6712384
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15581) - you deserved it (37356)

On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, in aerobics, while stretching, my friend leaned over to pull the long hair off my pants. It was my pubic hair sticking through my pants, and I screamed. FML

#6660964
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15735) - you deserved it (43996)

On 12/08/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by cookscatastrophy - United States (California)

Today, I found out my neighbor has been watching my husband and I have sex for the 2 years we've been married. He slaps his sausage and smokes 5 cigarettes while he watches. FML

#6656855
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21503) - you deserved it (5273)

On 12/07/2009 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by niquey62307 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

#6533285
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48445) - you deserved it (3167)

On 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm - misc - by annonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was watching my 7 year old daughter and her friend jump on our trampoline. I was really impressed by all the flips they were doing, and I told her "Hey! I can't even do that." To that her friend replied " Of course you can't. You're fat!" FML

#6443254
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34316) - you deserved it (7778)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:43am - kids - by madeyoulaugh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

#6367890
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28407) - you deserved it (3742)

On 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by pussystroker (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, whilst singing at school in front of 300 visiting primary school children I forgot the second verse to my song and let out an F*** word with the microphone still up to my face. FML

#6364461
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8381) - you deserved it (36723)

On 11/19/2009 at 1:10am - kids - by fail (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it was my turn to do the suite's dishes. I was in the process of drying my roommate's coffee mug when the handle suddenly snapped off and the sharp edge left on the mug scraped down my arm. I now have a 3-inch long gash in my arm. I was attacked by a cheap coffee mug. FML

#6351303
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25086) - you deserved it (3731)

On 11/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by disheshateme (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while my girlfriend was going down on me, she looked up at me and said, in a high-pitched voice, "Yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy!" FML

#6312781
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11108) - you deserved it (20160)

On 11/15/2009 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by loldick (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML

#5841852
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8122) - you deserved it (60032)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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