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blackwidowtaco

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blackwidowtaco

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 May 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2798
  • Number of comments : 435
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About blackwidowtaco : Shit happens.

blackwidowtaco's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:52pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:44pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 2:29am<b>ZaroraQuinsey</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:34am<b>yehyeh</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 2:22am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 12:13am<b>thedeadmen</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 3:07pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 4:15pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 7:10pm<b>DEATHBYEX1LE</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 1:17am<b>tallbaby9891</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:56pm<b>Kain713</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 9:24pm<b>Rodux16</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 11:25pm<b>k34nu</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 5:18pm<b>swarm20</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 4:23am<b>dravvy</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 5:10am<b>CorpsmanUp88</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 10:59pm<b>AdamTR</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 4:21pm

blackwidowtaco's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of blackwidowtaco's badges

blackwidowtaco's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12661) - you deserved it (57939)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44182) - you deserved it (3126)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60245) - you deserved it (12596)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36961) - you deserved it (6057)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML

#16235054
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30274) - you deserved it (11923)

On 05/18/2011 at 6:57am - kids - by JCC (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML

#16166578
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38358) - you deserved it (4333)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

#16081373
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37275) - you deserved it (11918)

On 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm - misc - by Mel (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML

#16033229
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13939) - you deserved it (31073)

On 05/03/2011 at 3:51pm - health - by Username - United States (Washington)

Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML

Today, I called my mom to tell her that I'm coming over for a visit. She answered: 'Why? What do you need? Food? Money? I'm not going to help you! You're a grown woman!' And she hung up. I just found out that I'm pregnant and she was the first person I wanted to share it with. FML

#15411546
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44715) - you deserved it (4355)

On 03/21/2011 at 3:07am - misc - by kelly (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

#15385688
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38918) - you deserved it (7194)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Abby_gummibear (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

#15209845
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37373) - you deserved it (3369)

On 03/05/2011 at 8:42pm - health - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37629) - you deserved it (23432)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML

#15087841
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21463) - you deserved it (41792)

On 02/23/2011 at 5:06am - intimacy - by failed (man) - Switzerland (Vaud)

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

#15036235
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28644) - you deserved it (8028)

On 02/19/2011 at 2:20am - love - by PlayboyBunny (woman) - United States (Texas)



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