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bkingkingking

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bkingkingking
  • Town/Country : Farnborough, United Kingdom
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1184
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About bkingkingking : http://twitter.com/bkingkingking

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bkingkingking's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20464) - you deserved it (15234)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, at football practice, a 200lb lineman ended up landing on my stomach. The weight made me shit myself. My new nickname is "Muddbutt". FML

#17880531
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26540) - you deserved it (3169)

On 10/01/2011 at 6:45pm - misc - by FirstStringQB - United States (California)

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23515) - you deserved it (5802)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sent home from work early because of structural issues. I walked in on my unemployed boyfriend cuddling another woman on the couch. When I confronted them, he freaked out and kept trying to convince me that I was dreaming. I don't know what I ever saw in this loser. FML

#17811701
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34906) - you deserved it (3943)

On 09/23/2011 at 7:04am - love - by alone - China

Today, I was at Wal-Mart walking around when I slipped on some water and twisted my ankle. As I was getting up, a man comes up to me and said "There's some water on the floor, watch out." FML

#17770342
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20300) - you deserved it (2230)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:20am - misc - by yeahhhhhommmie (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML

#17757817
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21704) - you deserved it (3319)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the hillbillies who inhabit the apartment above mine got karaoke machine. It's 1 am and they're singing Achy Breaky Heart. FML

#17715363
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29313) - you deserved it (2812)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:18pm - misc - by 5.9Cummins (woman) - Canada

Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML

#17678479
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19306) - you deserved it (3873)

On 09/06/2011 at 4:06am - work - by Shamed - United Kingdom

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get a harmonica removed from my mouth. FML

#17675757
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10169) - you deserved it (16359)

On 09/05/2011 at 10:52pm - health - by wheezy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to a baseball game. On the way in, I managed to trip and get stuck in the turnstile. It took five minutes of flailing and twisting around in front of hundreds of people before I managed to pull myself out. FML

#17646290
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16615) - you deserved it (3716)

On 09/02/2011 at 6:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I made hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML

#17642045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8107) - you deserved it (27174)

On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32007) - you deserved it (4154)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

#17629318
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38361) - you deserved it (10752)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

#17612047
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10835) - you deserved it (49050)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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