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bkingkingking

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bkingkingking
  • Town/Country : Farnborough, United Kingdom
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1141
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About bkingkingking : http://twitter.com/bkingkingking

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bkingkingking's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my dog is an aspiring underwear designer, her latest project being creating crotchless underwear. Mine seem to have been used as prototypes. FML

#18200720
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23694) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/09/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by blacktyaffair - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31176) - you deserved it (8636)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

#18139418
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27158) - you deserved it (4925)

On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was the 19th wheel at a party. Yes, I counted. FML

#18126270
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30761) - you deserved it (4184)

On 11/01/2011 at 1:01am - love - by Tom - United States

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

#18086804
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12166) - you deserved it (32291)

On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States

Today, it was my birthday. We had a huge family dinner and everyone was invited, including my boyfriend. My family is kind of stuck-up, so I was very nervous about him meeting them. He got into an argument with my uncle over how "awesome" Van Halen is, and ignored me all night. FML

#18070147
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19443) - you deserved it (3428)

On 10/25/2011 at 3:10am - love - by SNBBFF - United States (Florida)

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

#18069827
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27721) - you deserved it (2913)

On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13704) - you deserved it (55149)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML

#18034396
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27464) - you deserved it (8100)

On 10/20/2011 at 9:24pm - health - by box bulge - China

Today, for our 3rd anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML

#18014393
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48187) - you deserved it (4389)

On 10/18/2011 at 10:16am - health - by stdpositivenow (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML

#18002643
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13098) - you deserved it (18387)

On 10/16/2011 at 10:50pm - work - by Kate - United States

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

#17960202
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31079) - you deserved it (7755)

On 10/11/2011 at 3:06pm - intimacy - by margelover (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

#17912138
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7613) - you deserved it (30660)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20461) - you deserved it (15232)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML



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