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bjr1208

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bjr1208

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4635
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About bjr1208 : If your seeing this you are a creeper. I don't give a fuck about what you call me. "arguing on the Internet is like running a race at the special olympics, if you win, your still retarded"

bjr1208's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>Sweerectioner13</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 8:17am<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:20pm<b>Rhett_15</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 9:39pm<b>tshurtz722</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 11:44am<b>xxButtersxx</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 8:50am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 9:19pm<b>msmama1985</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 9:01pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:48am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:53pm<b>koolkool994</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:10am<b>shelbelz</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 5:25pm<b>Stephy94</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 7:16am<b>Redundant_Idiot</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 8:32am<b>Preposterous</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 5:36am<b>mimi_animee</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:07pm<b>glamophonic</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 1:49am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 1:03am

bjr1208's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

bjr1208's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40169) - you deserved it (12380)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

#19289453
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21619) - you deserved it (11881)

On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, my girlfriend of three days asked if we could start naming our future children. FML

#19285505
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31023) - you deserved it (4310)

On 03/15/2012 at 10:21pm - love - by spermbankonlegs (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25555) - you deserved it (6763)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28923) - you deserved it (18098)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out I've miserably failed a college exam. My friend had agreed to pass me answers if I needed them, since I've hardly studied this year. We were on the phone when she said, "Oh, those answers were bullshit. Serves you right, huh?" FML

#19252817
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7232) - you deserved it (63403)

On 03/10/2012 at 5:48pm - misc - by Alison (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29338) - you deserved it (3866)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21547) - you deserved it (27193)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML

#19177249
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23234) - you deserved it (2596)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:37pm - misc - by Username (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17168) - you deserved it (29489)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML

#19159270
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32184) - you deserved it (7765)

On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML

#19109811
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26703) - you deserved it (17724)

On 02/18/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Lilah - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently, the mafia is out to get him. FML

#19071061
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23135) - you deserved it (2765)

On 02/14/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Just_Me_88 (woman) - United States

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing that song that goes 'I'm too sexy for my shirt' when we have sex. Now, every time that we have sex, that song is going to be stuck in my head. FML

#19005217
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7849) - you deserved it (34735)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by tkr (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that he should sing that song that goes 'I'm too sexy for my shirt' when we have sex. Now, every time that we have sex, that song is going to be stuck in my head. FML

#19005217
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7849) - you deserved it (34735)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by tkr (woman) - United Kingdom



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