Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bjnono001

Offline (the 01/25/2015 at 8:05am) | Search for a member

bjnono001

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 622
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bjnono001's page activity

Visits<b>drshn</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 7:04pm<b>dcisecurite</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:37am<b>TML329</b> - the 12/23/2012 at 10:30pm

bjnono001's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of bjnono001's badges

bjnono001's favorite FMLs

Today, I finished the run for a play in which I played a gay man. Now that all the performances are over, I have kissed a man more times in my life than I have kissed a woman. I'm straight. FML

#2963863
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49030) - you deserved it (9401)

On 06/17/2009 at 10:06am - love - by yashmoshin1 (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend was sick so I took her 5 year old daughter out to eat. Half-way through our "date" she asks me loudly "Can we go back to the car now and take our clothes off?" Apparently she meant her toy dog's clothes. Face burning, we left a half laughing/half glaring crowd behind. FML

#1962553
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44041) - you deserved it (2857)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by BigBadTron (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was at the beach and fell asleep in the sun. When I woke up, there was a blob of sunscreen on my leg. Thinking it was my boyfriend who was sweet enough to squeeze sunscreen for me, I rubbed it into my leg. After smelling my hands, I discovered it was bird poop. FML

#1339602
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44982) - you deserved it (16218)

On 04/25/2009 at 11:10pm - animals - by poopedon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to a guy I met online and have known for 4 years. I've fallen in love with him twice, one of those times being currently. He was supposed to visit this summer. I got an email from him saying he's really a 17 year old girl from Chesterfield, MO. FML

#966789
355 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29954) - you deserved it (87963)

On 04/14/2009 at 9:45am - love - by oxbbabexo (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was having lunch at a cafe. There was an attractive guy looking at me from another table. I smiled back and gave a little wink. A minute later he approached me. I introduced myself and asked if he wanted my number. He said, "Um, no but what are you eating? It looks really good" FML

#670430
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44525) - you deserved it (19854)

On 03/28/2009 at 10:14pm - misc - by Samantha (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was singing Alicia Keys in the shower and hitting the insanely high notes. My father ran into the bathroom and threw open the shower door, screaming. He thought I was wailing in pain. FML

#179032
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17802) - you deserved it (43282)

On 03/02/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by legit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was recorded a video for my friend on her wall, I forgot to click "stop recording" and got undressed for a shower. When I got out of the shower I noticed I hadn't posted it. A few minutes later I started getting a lot of notifications. Everyone was commenting on my nude video. FML

#154846
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17360) - you deserved it (46555)

On 02/27/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by paige (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

#4044
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9638) - you deserved it (45212)

On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have been reading FML for 12 hours. FML

#4028
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39292) - you deserved it (14573)

On 01/31/2009 at 8:51am - misc - by ayw329 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML

#3360
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19041) - you deserved it (2303)

On 01/29/2009 at 12:04pm - misc - by K Holed - United States (New York)

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

#689
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19548) - you deserved it (7017)

On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version

Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction. He said, "I love Los Angeles too!" FML

#6
440 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88587) - you deserved it (40390)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:19am - love - by mocass’1 (woman) - France



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #11
  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

Wednesday 28 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: