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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 14 August 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13252
  • Number of comments : 2169
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 48 posted

About bizarre_ftw : I'm: unusual, nuts, crazy in the best of ways, a seasoned mistake maker, too curious for my own good, and outside the box to the point of being in a different reality

My skills include but are not limited to: glass blowing and molding, painting, acting, writing, a little bit of modeling, giving massages, running in heels, drawing, cherry stem tying with my highly skilled tongue, pool/billiards, swimming, talking, cooking, etc..

Skills I plan to have: skydiving, cage diving, contortionism, knife throwing, and so much more

I love sharks, I plan to be a marine biologist, I have an hourglass figure, a near perfect hip to waist ratio (bragging is good for the soul, or at least ego, I have no soul, I sold it for lunch last week ^_^)
- i'm tattooed, fear me

I love all intellectual and artistic pursuits, and meeting people

I'm either funny or I fail miserably (which in its own right is funny) i'm good either way.

Email: ... Let's see what happens :)

bizarre_ftw's page activity

Visits<b>tigersman1c</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 5:34am<b>besosforme</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 2:47am<b>Celeden</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 7:03am<b>AmeliaPond21042</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 6:21pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 9:40pm<b>Blizzicus</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 6:49pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:36pm<b>krispy_kreme792</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 6:38am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 6:51pm<b>pdp</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 5:20am<b>Cristian89</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 12:58pm<b>Esoomian</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 12:32pm<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 6:48pm<b>holly_fly</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 7:30pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 12:49pm<b>twitchywaffles</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 10:24pm<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 8:13am

Fucked!<b>mongoosemike</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 12:49am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 6:50pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 5:43am<b>mehibud</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 2:04am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:51pm<b>alexalexalex10</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 5:22pm<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 10:00am<b>jonloran</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 12:30am<b>thunderfucked</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 8:44am<b>a816090</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 11:55pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 9:39pm<b>Candace7</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 6:38am<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:02pm<b>Allnightampm</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 2:00pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:16am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 11:06am<b>rafa015</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 7:51pm<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 10:23pm

bizarre_ftw's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of bizarre_ftw's badges

bizarre_ftw's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32433) - you deserved it (9203)

On 02/24/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by JustADream (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up and heard a noise coming from the kitchen. I went down stairs and saw a huge guy in there. I got a vase and hit him over the head, not realizing it was my mom's new boyfriend. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32477) - you deserved it (5704)

On 02/21/2011 at 6:43am - misc - by Karl -

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59496) - you deserved it (4534)

On 02/12/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40720) - you deserved it (23677)

On 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm - misc - by Username -

Today, I was doing my grocery shopping, absent-mindedly wondering if my new diet was working. I got my answer when my panties fell down around my ankles. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26743) - you deserved it (7722)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:44pm - misc - by knickersdontfit (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out how hard a lemon is to the nuts when being hurled by an angry girlfriend for losing at Wii Sports. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (4861)

On 01/20/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by neverhavingkids (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview in months. The interviewer started by introducing herself and asking how I was. I got caught between introducing myself and telling her how I was and replied "I'm Kate thanks". FML


I agree, your life sucks (21523) - you deserved it (5184)

On 01/14/2011 at 2:51am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as I'm pregnant, my mom came over to do some nice things for me, such as clean my kitchen and cook a large pot of my favorite soup. When she left, I took a nap, planning to eat later. I woke up to find my roommates had trashed my kitchen and eaten all my soup. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33166) - you deserved it (4221)

On 01/11/2011 at 4:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, some of my classmates brought cupcakes to celebrate my birthday. I took the leftovers with me after class, and when my mom picked me up from school, she asked, "What are the cupcakes for?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (33077) - you deserved it (2585)

On 01/11/2011 at 4:17am - misc - by bdayboy (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was eating dinner with a friend when a really hot guy came up and introduced himself. He told us he was vegetarian, and I wanted to impress him so I told him I was too. I was eating a steak. FML


I agree, your life sucks (6530) - you deserved it (63821)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30976) - you deserved it (6334)

On 12/04/2010 at 6:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML


I agree, your life sucks (67051) - you deserved it (5297)

On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he felt so insecure he submerged my $80 vibrator in water to eliminate the competition. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32934) - you deserved it (15037)

On 11/27/2010 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13891) - you deserved it (30098)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29399) - you deserved it (7778)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:18pm - kids - by nicki - United States (Illinois)

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Tuesday 24 November 2015

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