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birdybirdchirp

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birdybirdchirp

1Fucked!

birdybirdchirpbirdybirdchirp
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4397
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About birdybirdchirp : sleep, work, chill.

birdybirdchirp's page activity

Visits<b>sarahyep</b> - 15 hours ago<b>SecretSociety7</b> - 15 hours ago<b>dakatabg</b> - 23 hours ago<b>rae_siah_3x</b> - yesterday at 8:51am<b>Edogg215</b> - yesterday at 7:41am<b>katydid91</b> - yesterday at 4:52am<b>PresAgent</b> - yesterday at 4:33am<b>skiddymarker</b> - yesterday at 2:09am<b>pikon</b> - yesterday at 1:28am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - yesterday at 12:53am<b>ENCOURAGER</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:21am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 3:15am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 10:33pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:56am<b>zjay</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 11:51pm<b>Steffi3</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 3:39am<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 1:17am<b>medic8</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 9:39pm

Fucked!<b>quinzxl</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:38pm

birdybirdchirp's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of birdybirdchirp's badges

birdybirdchirp's favorite FMLs

Today, my father passed away. I called my boss to let him know about the situation. His only response before hanging up: "Shit, dude. Well, I'll see you in the morning, these reports won't write themselves." FML

#21414400
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24114) - you deserved it (1334)

On 05/23/2015 at 10:50am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad came to my 8-year-old daughter's birthday party wearing a shirt that said "Small penis, huge dick." FML

#21414312
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22502) - you deserved it (1754)

On 05/23/2015 at 3:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

#21414219
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20426) - you deserved it (2052)

On 05/22/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by Kurda (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, was my first experience having sex. It was also my first experience with a condom breaking. FML

#21413990
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26662) - you deserved it (3377)

On 05/22/2015 at 12:27pm - intimacy - by Vexatious - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got a call from a really great company that I applied to work for, asking me to come in for an interview. When I went in, they had no appointment scheduled and no idea who I was. It turned out it was all a prank by my brother and his friends. My brother is 30. FML

#21413299
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26170) - you deserved it (1744)

On 05/20/2015 at 10:49pm - work - by stilljobless (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my grandmother yelled at me for driving erratically. I was "driving" in a video game. FML

Today, a new employee started at our office. She's about 18, barely does any work, chews gum loudly, has no manners, and happens to sit right next to me. She also threatens to report me for harassment whenever I politely ask her to not bash my chair with the back of her chair. FML

#21413003
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26759) - you deserved it (1908)

On 05/20/2015 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Cyprus (Paphos)

Today, my girlfriend suggested we start using a safe word during sex - not because we're into BDSM or anything like that, it's just in case she gets bored and wants me to stop. FML

#21412386
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27080) - you deserved it (4313)

On 05/19/2015 at 2:45am - intimacy - by username - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

Today, I found out my wife confided in a coworker that she wants to sleep with him, because our marriage is loveless and sexless. News to me. FML

#21410043
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29004) - you deserved it (2648)

On 05/14/2015 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by semokco (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML

#21409835
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28526) - you deserved it (2147)

On 05/14/2015 at 1:11am - animals - by cricketsins (woman) - United States

Today, I got a friend request on Facebook. It's from the person who crashed into my car earlier in the month. It's funny that she doesn't return my calls or messages, but liked my status about the accident. FML

#21409756
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27107) - you deserved it (1807)

On 05/13/2015 at 10:55pm - work - by iamgodzilla (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
100 comments

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33796) - you deserved it (4520)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML

#21397871
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28598) - you deserved it (2124)

On 04/22/2015 at 9:31am - kids - by ireallylikecats - United States



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