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birdfreak

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birdfreak

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12263
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

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birdfreak's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

#1023184
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13492) - you deserved it (71310)

On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML

#1018681
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15479) - you deserved it (127929)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had a playing test in orchestra, which I've pracriced over 30 hours for. After I played my part, which I thought I did very well, my teacher asked how much I had practice. Trying to show off, I said "Oh, just 30 minutes." My teacher said "It shows, that was terrible." She was serious. FML

#982369
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17780) - you deserved it (54364)

On 04/15/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my mom asked if she could use my red dress for her two-week trip to the Caribbean. I said no, because I was going to a party and I wanted to wear it. She called me a selfish, greedy bitch who would stay single forever. I paid for her plane ticket, her hotel fees and her cruise ship fee. FML

#976819
413 comments

I agree, your life sucks (187806) - you deserved it (13709)

On 04/14/2009 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

#973952
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31974) - you deserved it (52003)

On 04/14/2009 at 4:40pm - misc - by blehh (man) - United States

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "but I just peed in that water." FML

#965194
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (88155) - you deserved it (8703)

On 04/14/2009 at 4:51am - kids - by poolboy (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

#910687
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32758) - you deserved it (60806)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by ripped (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got back a paper after a peer review. I had worked really hard on it over the last week and was proud of the end result. When I got the paper back the only positive comment on the paper was "well I really like the blue staple you used to hold it together." FML

#897459
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50940) - you deserved it (4854)

On 04/10/2009 at 3:12am - misc - by Kim (woman) - United States

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40892) - you deserved it (135304)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40892) - you deserved it (135304)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
691 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36791) - you deserved it (503340)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

#825703
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10480) - you deserved it (93683)

On 04/05/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by Triedtobecool (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67494) - you deserved it (18495)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, when my boyfriend reffered to my hair, I told him I was going to dye it. He responded by saying, "finally, so how much you going for, 40, maybe 50 pounds?". I said dye it, not diet. FML

#810319
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57926) - you deserved it (8582)

On 04/05/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by lifestinks - Canada (Ontario)



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