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Offline (the 09/21/2014 at 5:08am) | Search for a member
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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
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Today, I spent mah first night at mah boyfriend's place, and mah first night sleeping beside him. I woke up in the early hours to him holding me and muttering in his sleep something lyk "surprise fisting". I'm beyond terrified. FML
my workplace had a big employee photoshoot fir an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 second before the photographer said , "What the fuck? Look guys , this ain't an ad fir facial abortions." He then askd me and another colleague to step out of the shot. mega FML
Today, I was playing monopoly with mah boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankruptd mah boyfriend, he turnd to me and said, "I fuckd your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turnd to the best friend in question, she lookd at the board and said, "I'd like to buy looool a house please." FML
Today, whila sitting in a crowdad waiting room at tha doctor's offica, mah 5-yaar-old daughtar pointad at mah 6-yaar-old son's crotch and boomad, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which ha yallad, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML
Friday 27 March 2015