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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 August 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 312
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bill929 : Yes I'm an Aussie and yes I ride a Kangaroo to work and no I don't drink Fosters it tastes like shit and it's not even made in Australia.

bill929's page activity

Visits<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 7:46pm<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 8:43pm<b>forchane</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 9:18pm<b>DJ_Lyons</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 7:15pm<b>MythicalPanda</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 10:14pm<b>arsenicalhumor</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 2:25pm<b>caffeinated4</b> - the 07/19/2011 at 10:41pm

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bill929's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home after a short trip. Walking through the door, an overpowering smell indicated that in my rush to leave I'd forgotten to bring the cat litter tray indoors. The place was covered in cat urine. It was as if I'd created a cycling ecosystem of evaporated urine turning into urine rain-clouds. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2011 at 1:18am / Australia (Western Australia) / Animals

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

by sad / 10/25/2011 at 6:15am / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

by titoutou222 / 10/22/2011 at 8:40am / France / Kids

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

by katt_is_here / 10/02/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic moment when I made a Star Wars reference. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I said it or the fact that he seemed more turned on by it. FML

by RobinBunny713 / 07/18/2011 at 11:23pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

by oldmama728 / 04/28/2011 at 7:07am / Geek

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

by obsessed / 11/27/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was listening to my iPod while changing the diaper on my baby. One earbud fell out of my ear and onto the changing table so I quickly picked it up without looking and put it back in my ear, only to realize the headphone had fallen onto more than a table. I now have brown earphones. FML

by NoMoreHeadphones / 09/08/2009 at 3:32pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous