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bigruebs

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bigruebs

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  • Number of visits : 27
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bigruebs's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of bigruebs's badges

bigruebs's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my roommate trying to put a burrito and a pack of mild sauce in between my boobs. He's only lived here for two weeks, and this is the second time I've woken up to him doing something like this. FML

#21278162
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36729) - you deserved it (4381)

On 10/15/2014 at 2:27am - misc - by burritobreasts -

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I discovered that I climax sooner if I think about pretzels. Yes, pretzels. The food product. I'll never be able to eat them again. FML

#21278160
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31191) - you deserved it (4266)

On 10/15/2014 at 2:26am - intimacy - by datgurllllukno (woman) - United States

Today, as I was about to leave home for my first sweet taste of freedom at my new apartment, my car died. I'm stuck here for at least the weekend and can look forward to my mom driving me to work. Freedom. FML

#21274254
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26454) - you deserved it (2372)

On 10/09/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by gonesofast - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I'm sick with the worst head cold of my life. For some reason whenever I cough, I also fart. Everyone thinks I'm just trying to cover up flatulence with fake coughing. FML

#21266077
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33520) - you deserved it (2907)

On 09/26/2014 at 10:46pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39164) - you deserved it (6242)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

#21265697
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30796) - you deserved it (5755)

On 09/26/2014 at 9:03am - work - by dicksonthebrain (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a garage sale, and had amongst my clothing a few sets of underwear. A old man came up and asked to buy all of them. I'm so poor, I couldn't say no to the pervert. FML

#21262480
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34204) - you deserved it (6956)

On 09/21/2014 at 2:23pm - money - by sickened (woman) - United Kingdom (Gateshead)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38719) - you deserved it (5543)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML

#21257293
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32197) - you deserved it (16086)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:29am - misc - by Nat - United States (Texas)

Today, I was driving to the DMV to take a test, after getting some points removed from my license. On the way there, I got a speeding ticket and got my license suspended completely. FML

#21256258
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17254) - you deserved it (46422)

On 09/11/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by hockusa3 - United States (Maryland)

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35174) - you deserved it (3144)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, while my orthodontist was working on my teeth, she made the comment, "Wow! It looks like a murder scene in there!" FML

#21250795
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32188) - you deserved it (4759)

On 09/02/2014 at 9:35pm - health - by Gee... Thanks (man) -

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32869) - you deserved it (7604)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I got suspended from work after getting caught reading a work-related FML. Irony is funny, but it doesn't pay the bills. FML

#21226986
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32256) - you deserved it (15547)

On 08/01/2014 at 6:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46805) - you deserved it (6630)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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