Marriage has less beauty but more safety than the single life. It’s full of sorrows and full of joys. It lies under more burdens, but it is supported by all the strengths of love, and those burdens are delightful.
Today, I was looking at the annoucements in the newspaper and find out that my boyfriend of the past 6 years is supposed to be married in 2 days to what I thought was his ex-girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17868) - you totally deserved it (1195)
On 11/16/2009 at 11:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had a surprise birthday party thrown in my honor. All of my friends and family had been invited, and all of the details were perfect. Who threw the party for me? My ex-girlfriend who I dumped last week for "not being thoughtful enough." FML
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On 11/16/2009 at 9:40pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, after months of trying to potty train my son, he finally told me he used the potty. I went to the bathroom to check. There was nothing there. So I asked him "Where did you go to the potty?". He then grabbed my hand and took me to the cat's litter box. My son has successfully litter trained himself. FML
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On 11/16/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - Japan (Okinawa)
Today, after dating for almost five years, my boyfriend stated that I have a "perfect and amazing personality" but that my looks are not what he "envisioned himself spending the rest of his life with." In other words, I'm ugly. FML
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On 11/15/2009 at 9:47am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I finally filed the divorce papers I was putting off for weeks. This is my third divorce. After my first husband cheated on me, and my second husband and I learned we had VERY different views, now my third husband is cheating on me with his fiancee. I'm a marriage counselor. FML
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On 11/12/2009 at 12:14am - misc - by akward411 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got a paper back that was given a zero for suspected plagiarism. Everything I wrote was my own thought and analysis. My instructor basically thinks my paper is smarter than I am. He won't listen, even when I explain my thought processes throughout the piece. FML
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On 11/10/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I woke up to find my garage broken into and my car covered in paint and with the words "F*** you". Why? I broke up with my ex because she cheated on me and stole money off me and my mom. Apparently this wasn't a good enough excuse to break her up with her. FML
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On 11/09/2009 at 3:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)
Today, I was pulled over and was given a $300 ticket for going 90mph on a 70mph highway. The cop swore he saw my silver car darting in and out of traffic. A couple of minutes earlier that exact car had passed me while I was following the speed limit. FML
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On 11/03/2009 at 1:00pm - misc - by wrongcar - United States (Kansas)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
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On 11/03/2009 at 2:24am - love - by whysheheartless (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went to a family counseling session because my parents are getting a divorce. I told the counselor that I feel guilty because I feel like I caused it. She says that there is no way I could have caused it, that it's my parents' problem when my mom interrupts her to say "Yes she did." FML
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On 11/02/2009 at 4:05pm - misc - by problemchild (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today I was at a party and saw an old friend from college. I went up to her asking how she was and how her family was. She went on to tell me that her husband left her a month ago and started crying. I told her that he was an ass anyway and that she didn't need him. Turns out he died. FML
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On 11/01/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Oops (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I came back home to meet people before going away to university, including my ex and her new boyfriend. We broke up about two months ago and there were no bad feelings between us, so I decided to have a chat with them. I asked "How long have you been going out?" He replied "Seven months." FML
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On 11/01/2009 at 2:02pm - love - by H4rd_Man (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I was hit by a car speeding through an intersection after the light had already turned red. Still partly blacked out, I crawled onto the sidewalk and I sat down. The woman rolled down her car window and yelled, "Watch where you're going!" as she drove by. FML
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On 10/30/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by legotron (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I decided to adopt a 11 year old dog that has been in need of a home for several months. Two hours after I got him home, I discovered him dead in the backyard. FML
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On 10/30/2009 at 3:45am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was sitting in the cafeteria with my friends when I suddenly passed out due to my hypoglycemia. When I woke up, I discovered that I was still in the same spot and my friends had abandoned me to go to class. Also, my stuff was stolen. FML
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On 10/27/2009 at 9:15pm - misc - by hey-ooo (woman) - United States (Texas)
