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bigbertha22

Offline (the 11/23/2014 at 12:08pm) | Search for a member

bigbertha22

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 February 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 218
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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bigbertha22's page activity

Visits<b>BruinsFTW108</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 9:22pm<b>onedothtread</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 10:07am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 2:22pm<b>Wingman527</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 9:55pm<b>lachataigne</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 6:58pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:05pm<b>_spacekid</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 4:16pm<b>iSativa</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 4:47pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 10:45am<b>Kamon97</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 11:40pm

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bigbertha22's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36276) - you deserved it (2408)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41665) - you deserved it (8287)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't really take flute lessons after all. In related news, every time my best friend supposedly drives her to flute lessons, he's actually taking her to his house for a different kind of activity. FML

#21243834
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50348) - you deserved it (6006)

On 08/23/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46192) - you deserved it (7635)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44367) - you deserved it (16471)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49079) - you deserved it (7776)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

#21199096
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47022) - you deserved it (9171)

On 07/05/2014 at 12:26am - intimacy - by bad in the sack - United States

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45805) - you deserved it (26138)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML

#21183245
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44677) - you deserved it (6544)

On 06/21/2014 at 3:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my mother came over to check on my new kitten while I was at work. She took a video of the kitten playing on my bed and climbing on my nightstand. Right on top of my vibrator I forgot to put away. I'm not sure if she noticed or not but she's certainly been showing the video around. FML

#21182483
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44417) - you deserved it (13826)

On 06/20/2014 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by misoranomegami (woman) - United States

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

#21180513
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45979) - you deserved it (7672)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:33am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46581) - you deserved it (7000)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47471) - you deserved it (7221)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my boyfriend found a movie he loved on Netflix. He was so excited to show it to me and was certain I'd love it. I didn't have the heart to tell him what I really thought of White Chicks. FML

#21148492
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36622) - you deserved it (9480)

On 05/22/2014 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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