bigantennaemay

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Offline (the 09/09/2014 at 9:58am)

bigantennaemay

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 April 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1528
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bigantennaemay : i'm a metalhead, love music, love gaming, love reading about other people's lives in the shitter. Gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling somewhere in the cavity where my heart should be.

bigantennaemay's page activity

Visits<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 7:11pm<b>Ner0ity</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 10:58am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 3:19am<b>jawidm</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 5:04pm<b>blazingturtle</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 10:41am<b>Demonking</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:37pm<b>windfuelsfire</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 11:26pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/05/2012 at 10:37pm<b>zombiegold</b> - the 02/01/2012 at 8:43pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:15pm<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 05/23/2011 at 11:40am<b>Zebidee</b> - the 02/14/2011 at 3:05pm<b>Acousticpixie14</b> - the 02/02/2011 at 4:25am<b>karma50</b> - the 02/01/2011 at 4:08pm<b>rasta_pasta</b> - the 01/31/2011 at 1:11am<b>Killa_Comin</b> - the 01/27/2011 at 3:56pm<b>Sakura13</b> - the 01/27/2011 at 2:05pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 9:22pm

bigantennaemay's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

bigantennaemay's favorite FMLs

Today, I drove home from work, only to find both my next-door neighbours loudly arguing in the middle of my driveway. I got out and asked them what the hell was going on, only to find out one of their inbred kids had put a brick through my back window, and each is claiming the other did it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2012 at 6:45pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mugged by a guy who was threatening me with a stapler. FML

by StaplerScared / 11/08/2011 at 9:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

by steve-o / 11/02/2011 at 1:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

by benji / 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML

by VladyBoi / 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

by poopcoloredeyes / 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while standing in line at the supermarket, I reached past my wife to get a pack of gum. She jokingly did the "battered wife flinch" to get a laugh, and smiled at me from behind her hand. The cop staring at us obviously didn't notice the smile and definitely didn't think it was funny. FML

by spacemanspiff78 / 10/31/2011 at 11:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into my car after a long shift at work. When I looked in my rear view mirror, a horrifyingly evil face grinned at me from the back window. I leaped out of the car, only to be chased around by two people in clown masks. It turned out to be a prank set up by my co-workers. FML

by Katrin / 10/30/2011 at 3:13pm / Norway / Transportation

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2011 at 1:14am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 4:29am / Reserved / Health

Today, I went on a date with a respectable, successful, polite, and attractive guy. Ten minutes into the conversation, I find out he's a neo-Nazi and earned a swastika tattoo in prison for "something shady." FML

by thatgirl / 10/10/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

by DyingPlants / 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, a woman came into my work and yelled at me because no one told her the cake she had bought the week before was made of ice cream. She'd hidden it in the cupboard and it melted. I work in Dairy Queen. FML

by ab / 10/09/2011 at 1:11am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML

by G / 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous