Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

biasedshooter

Online | Search for a member

biasedshooter

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 June 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10776
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics.

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>Unlisshed</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 6:28am<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:22am<b>JayFuckingHell</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:53pm<b>TheVengefulGeek</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:47am<b>grunt2423</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:13am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 1:51am<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 6:38pm<b>s0m3guy2010</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:26pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 9:34am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 8:21am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:41pm<b>ThatAmericanDude</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:37pm<b>SaintJin</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:07pm<b>gummybeargirl</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:41pm<b>Guren123</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:39pm<b>FWMYKIGI1990</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:22pm<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:17pm<b>lickastick</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:59pm

Liked!<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:22am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:54pm<b>Coolgo</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:56pm

biasedshooter's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of biasedshooter's badges

biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML

#20724232
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53407) - you deserved it (6536)

On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML

#20719275
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43421) - you deserved it (6612)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57165) - you deserved it (66079)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. 20 minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML

#20708003
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53528) - you deserved it (4057)

On 06/05/2013 at 6:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30863) - you deserved it (65734)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML

#20698927
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45170) - you deserved it (4503)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at the beach, my son needed to pee. I told him to pee in the ocean. He took off his pants and peed from the beach to the water. FML

#20691712
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18594) - you deserved it (44736)

On 05/28/2013 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56088) - you deserved it (32967)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67472) - you deserved it (5653)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

#20673456
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46709) - you deserved it (3585)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47948) - you deserved it (3365)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I registered on an irritable bowel support group, unknowingly linking it to my Facebook wall. FML

#20666712
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38654) - you deserved it (10254)

On 05/16/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

#20660456
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48069) - you deserved it (9180)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally convinced my mom to read Fight Club. As English isn't her first language, she occasionally asked me to translate some of the words. Her latest question: "What's a dildo?" FML

#20657087
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28455) - you deserved it (38078)

On 05/11/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by joeidk (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51245) - you deserved it (4441)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: