Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

biasedshooter

Online | Search for a member

biasedshooter

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 June 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10088
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics.

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>grunt2423</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:13am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 1:51am<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 6:38pm<b>s0m3guy2010</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:26pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 9:34am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 8:21am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:41pm<b>ThatAmericanDude</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:37pm<b>SaintJin</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:07pm<b>gummybeargirl</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:41pm<b>Guren123</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:39pm<b>FWMYKIGI1990</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 3:22pm<b>rhysfucker</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:17pm<b>lickastick</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:59pm<b>Genius_Kitty</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 2:35am<b>ZachHatesPeople</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 1:58am<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 6:47pm<b>xadoringx</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 2:18pm

Liked!<b>Alectrona</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:54pm<b>Coolgo</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:56pm

biasedshooter's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of biasedshooter's badges

biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, I was late for a medical school seminar and test. An SUV flipped over on the highway right in front of me. I held pressure to gushing, lacerated artery until EMS arrived. He lived, but I might have to repeat the whole year because I missed a big test. The test? Emergency response medicine. FML

#4459199
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63391) - you deserved it (2658)

On 08/11/2009 at 8:58pm - work - by doctorchick (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a patient was late for a psychiatry appointment, after having missed his previous two. I am the medical student on the team that was supposed to do his assessment. I said, "You snooze, you lose." Everyone stopped and looked at me. Apparently, he missed them because he has narcolepsy. FML

#4433335
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13528) - you deserved it (44307)

On 08/10/2009 at 6:48pm - health - by psychedout (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

#4432884
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22470) - you deserved it (62876)

On 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Morrowindwhore (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We start going at it and we were both butt naked when I see a car pull into the lot. Not only is it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asks my girlfriend is "Are you being held against your will?" FML

#4429167
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40955) - you deserved it (12456)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by kmf - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We start going at it and we were both butt naked when I see a car pull into the lot. Not only is it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asks my girlfriend is "Are you being held against your will?" FML

#4429167
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40955) - you deserved it (12456)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by kmf - United States (New Jersey)

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

#4425556
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12182) - you deserved it (50632)

On 08/10/2009 at 10:34am - misc - by klutz (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working in the box office. A group came in for tickets but wanted to pay individually. One paid $40 for a $25 ticket. Laughing, I reached for the calculator while saying, "I went to public school, so I can't do math." They didn't laugh. They were all teachers in public schools. FML

#4379266
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14301) - you deserved it (49912)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:02am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was working in the box office. A group came in for tickets but wanted to pay individually. One paid $40 for a $25 ticket. Laughing, I reached for the calculator while saying, "I went to public school, so I can't do math." They didn't laugh. They were all teachers in public schools. FML

#4379266
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14301) - you deserved it (49912)

On 08/08/2009 at 3:02am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML

#4371069
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40639) - you deserved it (6337)

On 08/07/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by scarredforlife (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said I remind her of her dad. FML

#4346574
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75006) - you deserved it (6855)

On 08/06/2009 at 10:03pm - love - by Jeremy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

#4332975
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50029) - you deserved it (4464)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:40am - misc - by daddysboy123 (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59464) - you deserved it (4288)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized how invisible/forgettable I am. At work, I went to ask my supervisor what I was working on today. My supervisor admitted that he forgot I was working today. My supervisor is my brother. We drove to work together this morning. FML

#4212428
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44962) - you deserved it (2986)

On 08/01/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by Forgotton (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67048) - you deserved it (15343)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: