Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

biasedshooter

Online | Search for a member

biasedshooter

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 June 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11116
  • Number of comments : 94
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics.

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>Johnatron</b> - 3 hours ago<b>bleedingglitter</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 2:06am<b>eleanorrigby90</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:03am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:49am<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:54pm<b>Unlisshed</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 6:28am<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:22am<b>JayFuckingHell</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 12:53pm<b>TheVengefulGeek</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 1:47am<b>grunt2423</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:13am<b>amadeclton</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 1:51am<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 6:38pm<b>s0m3guy2010</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:26pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 9:34am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 8:21am<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 11:41pm<b>ThatAmericanDude</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:37pm<b>SaintJin</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:07pm

Liked!<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:22am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:54pm<b>Coolgo</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:56pm

biasedshooter's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of biasedshooter's badges

biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the movies with the girl I liked. She kept on eating my popcorn so I whispered in her ear "Pretty soon your going to have to repay me with kisses." Then she looked at me and walked out the theatre. She came back with a bucket of popcorn and said "Here, you're repaid." FML

#4925971
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32916) - you deserved it (41308)

On 08/30/2009 at 8:19am - love - by regected (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was giving him dirty looks at a concert. His air guitar motions made it look like he was jacking off under the table. FML

#4921457
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34780) - you deserved it (2580)

On 08/30/2009 at 1:25am - intimacy - by Embarassed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to give a speech on the importance of dental hygiene. I got really nervous, so I did what I've heard in movies. I pictured everyone naked, began staring at a hot blonde in the front, and got hard. FML

#4906491
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14671) - you deserved it (49310)

On 08/29/2009 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by SOdamnNervous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

#4905255
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46371) - you deserved it (4075)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:46pm - health - by mommy_issues (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

#4905255
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46371) - you deserved it (4075)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:46pm - health - by mommy_issues (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had my first real date with my first serious boyfriend. I was nervous because from past experience. I learned my lips were a bit ticklish and I usually giggled a bit during kissing. Well, we started making out and I thought was I doing pretty good hiding my laughs. Until I wet myself. FML

#4819197
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46562) - you deserved it (9874)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:56pm - love - by RitaDahhlinnnng (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, for karaoke, I sang American Woman by Lenny Kravitz. The entire audience cracked up laughing and at least three people pulled out their cell phones to record my performance. At the end, the DJ said, "Looks like someone had too much tonight." I was completely sober. FML

#4813965
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37462) - you deserved it (10669)

On 08/25/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by Cossack_Man (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML

#4789258
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42515) - you deserved it (6981)

On 08/24/2009 at 5:27pm - love - by NotCuteEnough (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my first period. My dad bought me a card and had everyone in my family sign it. FML

#4787214
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53011) - you deserved it (4363)

On 08/24/2009 at 3:59pm - misc - by embarassed_chick (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21664) - you deserved it (39006)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after my partner of two years broke up with me, I decided to have a heart to heart with my mother about it. Her advice was to clean the house. I asked how that would make me feel better. She said that she wasn't sure, but at least the house would be clean. FML

#4744238
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26653) - you deserved it (4122)

On 08/22/2009 at 8:43pm - love - by Loveless (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

#4730526
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34983) - you deserved it (4034)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:29am - kids - by naughtyshirt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML

#4717200
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33694) - you deserved it (8751)

On 08/21/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by Becky (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

#4713882
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36399) - you deserved it (4127)

On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

#4699130
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15456) - you deserved it (46975)

On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: