Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

biasedshooter

Offline (the 04/18/2015 at 1:08am) | Search for a member

biasedshooter

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 June 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12397
  • Number of comments : 98
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics.

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>rainbow_llamas</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 5:55pm<b>TheSmartAss10</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 3:42pm<b>naTOtheBILL</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 9:24pm<b>m_warner1</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:34am<b>Johnatron</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:28pm<b>A07</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 10:41am<b>Wrex</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 11:52am<b>arasx0</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:42am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:15am<b>hallieee</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:09am<b>Hime9908</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 3:29am<b>SAE2016</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:56pm<b>FruitPastels</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:46am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:29pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:45pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:27pm<b>emxy92</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 8:24pm

Fucked!<b>Leigghhh</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:57pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 2:28am<b>keithsbooty</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 1:55am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:56pm<b>Endore</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:55am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 9:54pm<b>HoneyBadgerFury</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 11:51pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:32am<b>aguynamednick</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 3:37am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 1:36pm<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:22am<b>Alectrona</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:54pm<b>Coolgo</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 3:56pm

biasedshooter's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of biasedshooter's badges

biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML

#7287898
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8475) - you deserved it (35911)

On 01/11/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

#7278236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25746) - you deserved it (3100)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML

#7264308
184 comments

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I looked skinny in my shorts. She jiggled my leg fat, looked up at me and walked away. FML

#7228491
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12105) - you deserved it (22828)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:36am - health - by Ashy104 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I asked my mom if she thought I looked skinny in my shorts. She jiggled my leg fat, looked up at me and walked away. FML

#7228491
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12105) - you deserved it (22828)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:36am - health - by Ashy104 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18348) - you deserved it (5108)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the doctor told me that I have Vasovagal Syncope: I pass out every time I get aroused. Bye bye sex. FML

#7198357
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38628) - you deserved it (2448)

On 01/07/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Sanchez (man) - United States

Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML

#7179468
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48007) - you deserved it (2296)

On 01/06/2010 at 9:55am - misc - by driver (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was rejected for a job I really wanted, they said I didn't have enough experience. I designed the systems they are implementing. FML

#7158540
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34132) - you deserved it (1720)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - work - by Me - France

Today, I was rejected for a job I really wanted, they said I didn't have enough experience. I designed the systems they are implementing. FML

#7158540
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34132) - you deserved it (1720)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - work - by Me - France

Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML

#7156329
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33193) - you deserved it (2854)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it was the first time my boyfriend had seen me naked. He grabs my breasts and then begins to sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." He is 22. FML

#7152531
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18915) - you deserved it (5304)

On 01/04/2010 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by ambermcnulty - Sent from mobile version

Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML

#7124600
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26377) - you deserved it (5821)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:28am - health - by i-should-probably-stick-to-swimming (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML

#7110537
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23986) - you deserved it (5862)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:17pm - love - by garfwebba (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39811) - you deserved it (18339)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: