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biasedshooter

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biasedshooter
  • Town/Country : TX, America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 June 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 6309
  • Number of comments : 79
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics. I also misspell alot of things. Deal with it!

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biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, for karaoke, I sang American Woman by Lenny Kravitz. The entire audience cracked up laughing and at least three people pulled out their cell phones to record my performance. At the end, the DJ said, "Looks like someone had too much tonight." I was completely sober. FML

#4813965
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32265) - you deserved it (9692)

On 08/25/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by Cossack_Man (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML

#4789258
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39133) - you deserved it (6535)

On 08/24/2009 at 5:27pm - love - by NotCuteEnough (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my first period. My dad bought me a card and had everyone in my family sign it. FML

#4787214
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46034) - you deserved it (3767)

On 08/24/2009 at 3:59pm - misc - by embarassed_chick (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

#4774065
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18922) - you deserved it (35607)

On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after my partner of two years broke up with me, I decided to have a heart to heart with my mother about it. Her advice was to clean the house. I asked how that would make me feel better. She said that she wasn't sure, but at least the house would be clean. FML

#4744238
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22020) - you deserved it (3679)

On 08/22/2009 at 8:43pm - love - by Loveless (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

#4730526
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29974) - you deserved it (3587)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:29am - kids - by naughtyshirt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML

#4717200
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28136) - you deserved it (7080)

On 08/21/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by Becky (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

#4713882
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33850) - you deserved it (3870)

On 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm - intimacy - by Ben (man) - United States

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

#4699130
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13792) - you deserved it (44835)

On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

#4699130
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13792) - you deserved it (44835)

On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74557) - you deserved it (5747)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I threw a party while my parents were gone. I forgot that our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so when people opened the door, it went off. I couldn't find the number for the alarm company, so the cops showed up. Everyone started cheering because they thought they were strippers. FML

#4646350
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10475) - you deserved it (48281)

On 08/19/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Life of the party - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a text from my girlfriend to break up with me. I was upset. One minute later another text from her said "sorry, wrong person." FML

#4618484
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56551) - you deserved it (2870)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Kazakhstan (Almaty)

Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML

#4582506
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11423) - you deserved it (29019)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm - misc - by Ricky (man) - United States (Arkansas)



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