About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics. I also misspell alot of things. Deal with it!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me telling me I have problems communicating and that I didn't understand her. When I asked her why she didn't talk to me about this before she said "I didn't want to talk about it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43604) - you deserved it (2304)
On 06/18/2009 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19717) - you deserved it (85102)
On 06/18/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my friend told me that he was having a scrabble tournament at his house with a bunch of our friends. I told my dad about the tournament and he gave me a special scrabble dictionary to bring. Hesitantly, I brought the dictionary and as I walked in everyone was playing beer pong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (10289)
On 06/17/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my friend told me that he was having a scrabble tournament at his house with a bunch of our friends. I told my dad about the tournament and he gave me a special scrabble dictionary to bring. Hesitantly, I brought the dictionary and as I walked in everyone was playing beer pong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (10289)
On 06/17/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my friend told me that he was having a scrabble tournament at his house with a bunch of our friends. I told my dad about the tournament and he gave me a special scrabble dictionary to bring. Hesitantly, I brought the dictionary and as I walked in everyone was playing beer pong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (10289)
On 06/17/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I asked my Swedish friend for some lines to impress this swedish girl I met at an expat party he took me to. I practised them all evening before I met her. I told her my feelings, and she scowled. Apparently I had wished the devil upon her - after asking if i could ejaculate on her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42504) - you deserved it (16277)
On 06/17/2009 at 10:57am - intimacy - by Dirtyswede (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, while working in a restaurant, I took an elderly man to his table under a red colored lamp. He asked me if this was "the red light district." I thought he was just kidding until when I was placing down the menus he leaned in and whispered creepily in my ear, "You know, you're really sexy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32267) - you deserved it (1850)
On 06/17/2009 at 3:12am - intimacy - by creepedouthostess (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my daughter asked me if we can make sticker art. Of course I said it was ok so she went to get some stickers. I wondered where she was going when she walked into the bathroom, but I didn't ask. I left the room and when I came back, her paper was blank and my pads were stuck to the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29842) - you deserved it (4074)
On 06/16/2009 at 6:35am - kids - by inboxbuddies (woman) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)
Today, I received the box my parents sent me for my birthday. Contents were a travel first-aid kit, and a remote control robot toy, with an age recommendation on the box of 8. I'm 29. They thought that since I'm an engineer I would like the toy. They also think I'll hurt myself with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31383) - you deserved it (2433)
On 06/16/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by JustAGiftCardPlease (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (42562) - you deserved it (10465)
On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States
Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (42562) - you deserved it (10465)
On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25311) - you deserved it (48610)
On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21475) - you deserved it (213890)
On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34311) - you deserved it (3170)
On 06/10/2009 at 6:50pm - health - by anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had to play the role of superman in a production on stage. They had to stuff my underwear because my 'thing' wasn't big enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63915) - you deserved it (4980)
On 06/10/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by superman_not (man) - United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross)
Monday 20 May 2013
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