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biasedshooter

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biasedshooter

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 June 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7366
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics. I also misspell alot of things. Deal with it!

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>haddiej</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 10:26am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:19pm<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 5:01am<b>wellfme</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:44pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 6:17am<b>Aquaman911</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:22am<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 7:46pm<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:33pm<b>pdp</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 5:41am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 6:16am<b>AllAloneOnTheSea</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 5:27pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 12:08pm<b>jdjackdaniel4</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 1:30pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 9:32pm<b>kevinE</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:42pm<b>pinklala15</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 5:05pm<b>PolarFlair</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 1:39pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 11:07am

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

#20586362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59615) - you deserved it (10725)

On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

#20586362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59615) - you deserved it (10725)

On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML

#20585943
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61725) - you deserved it (5415)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50422) - you deserved it (10834)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that my Twitter profile was very public when my business professor made fun of student tweets in class. My tweet went, "Totally bullshitting this business report" about the report I had just handed in, worth a large portion of my grade. FML

#20584642
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13199) - you deserved it (79325)

On 04/11/2013 at 3:49am - work - by imscrewed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

#20583902
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47181) - you deserved it (5428)

On 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm - love - by drama king? (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

#20583515
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49289) - you deserved it (7989)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

#20583359
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40139) - you deserved it (19289)

On 04/10/2013 at 9:26am - kids - by fatmom (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

#20582197
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46861) - you deserved it (4844)

On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

#20579781
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14709) - you deserved it (57758)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51119) - you deserved it (5641)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45318) - you deserved it (4694)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20079) - you deserved it (50708)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I was cast as beast in my high school's production of Beauty and the Beast. My Grandma's input? "At least they won't need any makeup." FML

#20566521
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33107) - you deserved it (3417)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Beast - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43105) - you deserved it (3205)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)



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