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biasedshooter

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biasedshooter

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 June 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7704
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About biasedshooter : I am not racist, biased, or discriminatory in any way. I do however make jokes on these topics. I also misspell alot of things. Deal with it!

biasedshooter's page activity

Visits<b>Secret_Ninjaa</b> - 32 minutes ago<b>Aero_x</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:46am<b>vixenfawkeys</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:10am<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:03pm<b>zdane</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 9:00am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:43pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:12pm<b>RockyLovesARacer</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:09pm<b>haddiej</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:08pm<b>Naveed_N</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:49pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:14pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 7:57am<b>Martijn1102</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 6:25am<b>PoppyBear45</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:15am<b>MissEris</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:59pm<b>TigerHood</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:49pm<b>zaphinarosee</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 6:47pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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biasedshooter's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34520) - you deserved it (6103)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35699) - you deserved it (5039)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37790) - you deserved it (5338)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went camping with my husband not too far from our house. We got our tent pitched up, stove ready and roll-out bed out. He then said, "I'm just gonna go for a walk." It had been about an hour before I decided to go find him. He had walked home to play CoD. FML

#21239602
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41480) - you deserved it (4638)

On 08/17/2014 at 6:19am - misc - by AnnoyedWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I began to sign "I love you" to my boyfriend from across the room. I ended up just poking myself in the eye. FML

#21238728
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30987) - you deserved it (8564)

On 08/16/2014 at 2:20am - love - by Hopeless romantic (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36994) - you deserved it (2547)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

#21230044
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43111) - you deserved it (6747)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by donutsex (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48223) - you deserved it (20949)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

#21220246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38265) - you deserved it (6595)

On 07/25/2014 at 11:54am - animals - by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41473) - you deserved it (21349)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, I asked my class of fifth graders to write down a list of all the compound words they knew. At least four of them put down 'motherfucker'. FML

#21218609
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39970) - you deserved it (4507)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40004) - you deserved it (6561)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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