About bguerrero : I obviously like funny people and reading fmls..it makes my day. I'm very easily entertained(:
I check my fml on the computer so just send a message if you want:) I will reply.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, my pet mouse demonstrated that he has bigger balls than my boyfriend, by running across the dinner table and eating off his plate, all while he jumped out of his chair, screaming like a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14670) - you deserved it (3337)
On 05/08/2012 at 12:41pm - animals - by gl0b3suck0r (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29113) - you deserved it (3236)
On 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by coffeeshopgirl (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24597) - you deserved it (4160)
On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)
Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22867) - you deserved it (4923)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Bridget (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29983) - you deserved it (2658)
On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24484) - you deserved it (3005)
On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14843) - you deserved it (5559)
On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)
Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23666) - you deserved it (1453)
On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19159) - you deserved it (1945)
On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (38717)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16019) - you deserved it (6150)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22162) - you deserved it (2566)
On 04/26/2012 at 10:43am - love - by Aus (woman) - United States
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22162) - you deserved it (2566)
On 04/26/2012 at 10:43am - love - by Aus (woman) - United States
Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21056) - you deserved it (1449)
On 04/26/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Diffy - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14954) - you deserved it (3082)
On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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