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bguerrero

Offline (the 01/02/2016 at 5:24am) | Search for a member

bguerrero

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3391
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bguerrero : 😊🖕🏼

bguerrero's page activity

Visits<b>fidoyal</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:13am<b>AscendV</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:10pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 4:34pm<b>loganswann</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:22pm<b>satanicdaydream</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:13pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 11:00am<b>lahutchins</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:24pm<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:53pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 2:09pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:48am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:03pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 11:40am<b>lexabunny18</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:47pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:37am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:32pm<b>0void0</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 8:35pm<b>lolszilla</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 2:14am<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 4:17pm

Fucked!<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:48am<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 11:53pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:37am<b>AscendV</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 4:23am

bguerrero's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of bguerrero's badges

bguerrero's favorite FMLs

Today, a coworker informed me that she thinks I may be descended from a race of goblins, because of my squat stature, ugly face and hairy arms. She was being completely serious. FML

#19995807
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23762) - you deserved it (2095)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:46am - work - by Goblin Girl (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61843) - you deserved it (11609)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

#19993573
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15718) - you deserved it (40655)

On 07/30/2012 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML

#19991371
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27340) - you deserved it (6763)

On 07/29/2012 at 8:25pm - misc - by oops (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML

#19990567
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30462) - you deserved it (4642)

On 07/29/2012 at 9:34am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at the mall, when I saw an elderly lady drop her groceries, so I rushed over to help her pick them up. She took one look at me, called me a "Liberal bastard," and shouted for me to get away from her before she called the cops. FML

#19987947
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22690) - you deserved it (2274)

On 07/27/2012 at 7:55pm - misc - by WTF is all I ask (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my long-term boyfriend insisted on me going down on him. When I asked what he would do in return, he said "I was thinking McDonald's". FML

#19985281
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28448) - you deserved it (4909)

On 07/26/2012 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got to see my boyfriend, after two months apart. As we hugged, he lifted me up and spun me around like in the movies. It would have been really romantic if I hadn't hit a little boy while he was riding past on his bike. I've just traumatized a little kid. FML

#19981666
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26675) - you deserved it (2880)

On 07/24/2012 at 2:33pm - kids - by Jessi (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML

#19980789
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12264) - you deserved it (22509)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:10am - animals - by screw the cat (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't want to go out with him because I was having a fat day. After ten minutes of fighting, he threw a ring box on the floor and stormed out. I basically refused his proposal because of my body issues. FML

#19977285
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10751) - you deserved it (67117)

On 07/22/2012 at 9:33pm - love - by henley -

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30121) - you deserved it (3316)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15029) - you deserved it (27659)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

#19913171
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31008) - you deserved it (3115)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37202) - you deserved it (5223)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -



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