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bguerrero

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bguerrero
  • Town/Country : Texas
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1014
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bguerrero : I obviously like funny people and reading fmls..it makes my day. I'm very easily entertained(:

I check my fml on the computer so just send a message if you want:) I will reply.

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bguerrero's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML

#20047299
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16014) - you deserved it (1748)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:52am - money - by anon - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend actually held onto my love handles while we were having sex. He said they "made it easier." FML

#20039086
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21783) - you deserved it (8964)

On 08/24/2012 at 9:53am - intimacy - by chunkymonkey (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22435) - you deserved it (3718)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML

#20011677
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5723) - you deserved it (43928)

On 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by feelsterrible (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

#20011112
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13353) - you deserved it (16889)

On 08/09/2012 at 7:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML

#20008307
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (5389)

On 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by ohai95 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I discovered that when I'm drunk, I hate wearing clothes. And it doesn't matter who is around to see it, not even my soon-to-be father-in-law. FML

#19997643
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5259) - you deserved it (20693)

On 08/02/2012 at 1:10am - misc - by wherermypants (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#19996782
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25813) - you deserved it (29313)

On 08/01/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I went to do the laundry at my hotel. I had just enough money for my two loads. After getting frustrated with the washer taking two of my quarters and giving no credit, I took the clothes out. The washer then locked the door shut and started without my clothes. FML

#19996404
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20862) - you deserved it (3948)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:44pm - misc - by jessmess (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister and I were watching the Olympics. Michael Phelps was on the screen, and I was thinking how hot he is. My sister commented on how he looks so much like our brother. I can never look at either of them the same way ever again. FML

#19995813
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20629) - you deserved it (3374)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a coworker informed me that she thinks I may be descended from a race of goblins, because of my squat stature, ugly face and hairy arms. She was being completely serious. FML

#19995807
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18498) - you deserved it (1624)

On 08/01/2012 at 1:46am - work - by Goblin Girl (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52249) - you deserved it (9696)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

#19993573
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11598) - you deserved it (33102)

On 07/30/2012 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)



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