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bguerrero

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bguerrero
  • Town/Country : Texas
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1025
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bguerrero : I obviously like funny people and reading fmls..it makes my day. I'm very easily entertained(:

I check my fml on the computer so just send a message if you want:) I will reply.

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bguerrero's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

#121139
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64511) - you deserved it (16985)

On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was discussing sex with my guy friends in their dorm when I asked one of them what he would do if I got naked and crawled into his bed. He replied, "Nothing. You're one of the guys now." They all agreed. FML

#113943
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58798) - you deserved it (20293)

On 02/23/2009 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by NeverGonnaGetAny (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I think teddy bears are THE most pointless and careless gift. He shyly gave me my birthday present afterwards. It was a carebear. FML

#94960
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7862) - you deserved it (55038)

On 02/21/2009 at 6:52am - misc - by eejit (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I was at the library studying. There was a really cute guy across the room. I decided to play it cool and walk his way and grab some water. Right as I walked by, my body decided to let out the loudest fart. He laughed. I kept walking and asked my friend to grab my books. FML

#80589
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24432) - you deserved it (11470)

On 02/19/2009 at 6:17pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend was about to give me a blowjob. When her lips met my penis, there was a huge static shock. I never got the blowjob, she is still laughing and I have ice on my penis. FML

#11750
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42101) - you deserved it (5860)

On 02/06/2009 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by beerpong26 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took a big sip of water while on a bus. It went down the wrong pipe, causing me to cough and hack loudly. The old woman sitting across from me asked if I was okay. Jokingly, I said, "Just dying." She replied, "You too, huh?" FML

#7761
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7959) - you deserved it (27561)

On 02/04/2009 at 10:48am - misc - by suicide (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my inebriated boyfriend and I were having sex. He rolls off of me without finishing, and says, "i'm bored." FML

#7619
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35258) - you deserved it (5534)

On 02/04/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by na (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML

#7370
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16267) - you deserved it (26798)

On 02/04/2009 at 6:23am - animals - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went out on a date with a girl for the first time. I opened her car door for her and then slammed her leg in it upon closing. She will be in a cast for 6 weeks. FML

#5393
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27492) - you deserved it (8535)

On 02/02/2009 at 12:23pm - love - by JD (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to go to a car show. I told him to hold on, I had to ask my mom. I quietly asked her to say no for me. She said "Sure!". FML

#4294
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6636) - you deserved it (28998)

On 01/31/2009 at 6:25pm - love - by oicwydt - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went out to eat with my aunt and uncle, I barely looked at the male waiter because I'm a shy person. Then my uncle says: "YOU SHOULD TAKE OUT MY NIECE! She's never dated in her life." I'm 19 and my match maker is my uncle. FML

#3846
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19744) - you deserved it (1848)

On 01/30/2009 at 5:08pm - love - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, I told the man I love to "go first" when we started talking at the same time. I wanted to confess my feelings, he wanted to tell me about his engagement. FML

#1517
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19544) - you deserved it (1646)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by biblio - United States (Texas)

Today, I went out to lunch with two friends from high school. We saw a girl that we graduated with at the restaurant. The girl gave both of them hugs and introduced herself to me. FML

#748
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16433) - you deserved it (1427)

On 01/07/2009 at 10:42am - misc - by bex - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was baby-sitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two hour struggle, I finally manage to get them into bed. I then ask them what they want before going to sleep, and the eldest replies: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML

#624
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27804) - you deserved it (2469)

On 12/29/2008 at 5:56am - kids - by Hellau - Sent from mobile version

Today, well actually last night, I did a full striptease for my girlfriend to "You can leave your hat on". When the song was over, I was then completely naked, she says to me : "Maybe we should have closed the shutters!" FML

#413
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28377) - you deserved it (9801)

On 11/29/2008 at 6:50am - intimacy - by ... - Sent from mobile version



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