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bguerrero

Offline (the 01/02/2016 at 5:24am) | Search for a member

bguerrero

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3384
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bguerrero : 😊🖕🏼

bguerrero's page activity

Visits<b>fidoyal</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:13am<b>AscendV</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:10pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 4:34pm<b>loganswann</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:22pm<b>satanicdaydream</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:13pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 11:00am<b>lahutchins</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:24pm<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:53pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 2:09pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:48am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:03pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 11:40am<b>lexabunny18</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:47pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:37am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:32pm<b>0void0</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 8:35pm<b>lolszilla</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 2:14am<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 4:17pm

Fucked!<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:48am<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 11:53pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:37am<b>AscendV</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 4:23am

bguerrero's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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bguerrero's favorite FMLs

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

#20076781
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20286) - you deserved it (22213)

On 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm - work - by Mrs. Teacher (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

#20076675
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28564) - you deserved it (2635)

On 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by wtf yourself, cunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML

#20073337
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33331) - you deserved it (7188)

On 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm - love - by hannah (woman) - New Zealand (Marlborough)

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28853) - you deserved it (2914)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27842) - you deserved it (3158)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML

#20069142
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11707) - you deserved it (31563)

On 09/12/2012 at 5:58pm - intimacy - by bruisedego31 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had just bought a new $60 basketball and decided to go try it out. Five minutes into playing, the ball decided to roll into the hands of a little girl, who then said, "Mine". I thought it was cute, until she skipped over to her parent's car and they drove off. FML

#20068584
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32553) - you deserved it (5290)

On 09/12/2012 at 4:52am - kids - by Bitchjackedmyball - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27450) - you deserved it (4003)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML

#20067539
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31860) - you deserved it (6264)

On 09/11/2012 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by apparently inexperienced (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

#20067208
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20176) - you deserved it (2418)

On 09/11/2012 at 2:47am - misc - by NotDrunk (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to pass a lady with a stroller, when she nearly fell. I used my ninja-like reflexes to catch her. Too bad my ninja-like reflexes didn't block the punch that she delivered to my fap-stick for apparently being a "pervert" for saving her. FML

Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML

#20066447
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23078) - you deserved it (7661)

On 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm - work - by kevcng (man) - United States

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#20066250
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19309) - you deserved it (74148)

On 09/10/2012 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by killmenow - United States (Washington)

Today, after 3 nights of insomnia, I was finally able to doze off. My boyfriend woke me up just to ask which soda in the fridge was mine. FML

#20062839
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24652) - you deserved it (1946)

On 09/08/2012 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML

#20054049
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30127) - you deserved it (2948)

On 09/02/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by ImOverHere (woman) - United States (Texas)



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