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bguerrero

Offline (the 01/02/2016 at 5:24am) | Search for a member

bguerrero

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3402
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About bguerrero : 😊🖕🏼

bguerrero's page activity

Visits<b>fidoyal</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:13am<b>AscendV</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:10pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 4:34pm<b>loganswann</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:22pm<b>satanicdaydream</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:13pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 11:00am<b>lahutchins</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:24pm<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:53pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 2:09pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:48am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 5:03pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 11:40am<b>lexabunny18</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:47pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:37am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:32pm<b>0void0</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 8:35pm<b>lolszilla</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 2:14am<b>neverdrinkSODA</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 4:17pm

Fucked!<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:48am<b>hi_im_ughlee</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 11:53pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:37am<b>AscendV</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 4:23am

bguerrero's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of bguerrero's badges

bguerrero's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my 13-year-old sister cutting her pubic hair with scissors. After a long talk about what on earth she was doing, she confessed to doing it so her boyfriend could find her clitoris. FML

#21507957
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24599) - you deserved it (2280)

On 12/26/2015 at 12:40am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

#21493785
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27748) - you deserved it (8729)

On 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML

#21493073
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30418) - you deserved it (3106)

On 11/16/2015 at 1:44am - intimacy - by WinnerWinnerNotEatingDinner (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML

#20891477
170 comments

Today, my girlfriend tried to get me to wear curly wig, so I could pretend to be Harry Styles in bed. FML

#20863117
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52963) - you deserved it (6753)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68984) - you deserved it (8743)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71058) - you deserved it (20145)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

#20121138
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26306) - you deserved it (1764)

On 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend learned how to somersault. He now thinks that he's a ninja and somersaults into every room. FML

#20105538
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23226) - you deserved it (4600)

On 10/07/2012 at 10:20am - love - by justabitembarrassed - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was invited to my boyfriend's house for dinner for the first time. His mom made a fantastic dinner, so I showed my appreciation by eating the lot. Apparently I was overdoing it because when I looked up everyone was staring. His dad muttered, "Slow the hell down." FML

#20102773
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14442) - you deserved it (27404)

On 10/05/2012 at 10:56am - misc - by OhMeGerd (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML

#20096195
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27322) - you deserved it (6799)

On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

#20094500
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33270) - you deserved it (5562)

On 09/30/2012 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. My dad noticed my depression and got me to tell him what was wrong. I told him everything, and trusting him to have an intelligent suggestion, I asked him what I should do. He shrugged and said, "Fuck, sue him, I dunno." FML

#20082521
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22853) - you deserved it (2707)

On 09/21/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Pissed (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked a girl I like to the movies. Wanting her to lean on me and stay in my arms during the movie, I chose a horror film. I screamed like a pussy the whole time. FML

#20078928
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8972) - you deserved it (42461)

On 09/19/2012 at 5:27am - love - by pussyface96 (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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