About bethyc4 : I've died twice and I'm still around. There is no gettin' rid of me fuckers! =D I've been on my own since the week I turned 18. I graduated High School a valedictorian and I work as a care giver and In-home personal care provider for the VA taking care of disabled children and vets.
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bethyc4's favorite FMLs
Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML
Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML
by Urinator / 09/16/2015 at 2:26pm / United Kingdom (Perth and Kinross) / Animals
Today, I heard my boyfriend telling a female friend that his ex was so gorgeous and out of his league that it made him feel inadequate, and so he now only dates within reach. She told him he's hot enough to have anyone he wants. 30 seconds later they were tongue-deep in each other's throat. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2015 at 7:25am / Germany (Hessen) / Love
Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML
by meunluckycharms / 09/14/2015 at 3:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, someone photoshopped my head onto some nude girl's body and spread it around at school. It was shockingly convincing. Now everyone's calling me a slut, and the worst part is I have no idea which photo the person used or where they got it from, so I can't prove it's a fake. FML
by Anonymous / 09/11/2015 at 1:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, I asked my teacher if he could tutor me for my upcoming exam. He said he'd look into it and let me know later. I later got called to the principal's office because my teacher claimed I'd propositioned him for sex. FML
by hale_551 / 09/11/2015 at 12:34pm / Miscellaneous
Today, my "friends" pulled an elaborate prank on me. First, they changed my ringtone to a recording of someone saying "Allahu Akbar" on repeat. Then, they called me as we had a moment of silence in honor of the 9/11 victims. FML
by EverettA / 09/11/2015 at 9:50am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by Doesn't Matter Had Sex / 09/08/2015 at 10:37pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by Mrs. Ned / 09/08/2015 at 10:00pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy
Today, I caught two kids passing notes to each other in my class, so I told them to see me afterwards. When one of the kids eventually came up, I noticed he was crying. He looked up at me and sobbed out, "I was trying to make my first friend!" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend about how I'm self-conscious about my B-cup breasts. About 20 minutes later, he pointed to another girl with a small chest and said, "See, you're not the only one with small tits!" FML
by Anonymous / 09/08/2015 at 6:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML
by princeronron / 09/07/2015 at 10:02pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Animals
by annonymous / 09/07/2015 at 4:56pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/06/2015 at 4:11pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I dyed my hair purple. I came out of the salon and a little girl walked past and said, "Wow, you look like a mermaid!", to which her mother quickly said, "No she doesn't, she looks like her parents don't love her." FML
by laurencoc / 08/31/2015 at 6:50pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids
- Today, I’m a student in China, and I attended a welcoming party for the new students. It consisted… Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me…