Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bennekat

Offline (the 10/29/2014 at 1:11am) | Search for a member

bennekat

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 547
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bennekat's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

bennekat's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML

#13687643
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12658) - you deserved it (32331)

On 11/02/2010 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend said he wants a Hello Kitty wedding. FML

#13559273
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37025) - you deserved it (8557)

On 10/23/2010 at 5:07am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur.' FML

#13493485
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11022) - you deserved it (34746)

On 10/18/2010 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after me and my boyfriend had pretty much amazing sex, he took off the condom and started swinging it back and forth, all while making the sounds of a clock and saying, "You are getting sleepy." FML

#13363773
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27439) - you deserved it (6143)

On 10/08/2010 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37439) - you deserved it (3489)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a little too drunk and confessed to my fiancé, the love of my life, that I've been faking my orgasms all along. I hate that I can't lie when I'm drunk. FML

#13283938
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9148) - you deserved it (35590)

On 10/02/2010 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10036) - you deserved it (33038)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML

#10832830
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34369) - you deserved it (7517)

On 05/29/2010 at 12:14am - health - by fmlpanda (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash a KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML

#10166473
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25448) - you deserved it (15735)

On 04/26/2010 at 5:42pm - misc - by Michelle (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

#8972575
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20606) - you deserved it (2245)

On 03/10/2010 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by robotchickens (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488
219 comments

Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML

#8565371
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24526) - you deserved it (6701)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML

#8554799
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31122) - you deserved it (2237)

On 02/22/2010 at 2:32pm - health - by mynoseburns (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I finally got to hook up with this hot guy I'd been talking to for a few weeks. To my surprise, he was sinfully drunk when he arrives. As we were going at it, he shits on my white carpet. Now the phrase "f***ing the shit out of someone" has a brand new meaning for me. FML

#8471213
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19579) - you deserved it (5142)

On 02/20/2010 at 5:47am - intimacy - by jo - United States

Today, I laughed so hard my milk went out my nose in front of the boy I liked. Then, since I was laughing so hard about that, I accidentally farted. FML

#7901856
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33158) - you deserved it (7761)

On 02/05/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by hisgirl4life (woman) - United States (Missouri)



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: