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benmbarnett

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benmbarnett

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  • Number of visits : 772
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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benmbarnett's favorite FMLs

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

#14043132
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58017) - you deserved it (10574)

On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, was my first day at school. I got kicked out of the class for imitating a monkey. I wasn't imitating a monkey... I was laughing. FML

#13865567
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32827) - you deserved it (4633)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

#13655467
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18106) - you deserved it (23435)

On 10/30/2010 at 10:14pm - love - by yummy(: - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for halloween. He said "Single". FML

#13610925
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43591) - you deserved it (4614)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:01am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML

#13570264
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36484) - you deserved it (3691)

On 10/24/2010 at 12:11am - love - by altocrm - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was woken by the news that my car had been found, but was completely destroyed due to a fire. I didn't even know my car was missing. FML

#13498140
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26593) - you deserved it (2513)

On 10/18/2010 at 11:52am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML

#13198134
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33000) - you deserved it (3827)

On 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm - misc - by huj - United States (Texas)

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML

#10853555
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27204) - you deserved it (4903)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:01am - animals - by misTreated (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML

#8615441
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28510) - you deserved it (2406)

On 02/24/2010 at 2:13pm - money - by creditwhore (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
330 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42149) - you deserved it (11924)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version

Today, my friend decided it was funny to burp in my face. The burp was actually vomit. We were in the food court at the mall. FML

#7395269
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28310) - you deserved it (2273)

On 01/17/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML

#7391871
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28696) - you deserved it (5815)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out my boyfriends' mother has invented a new kind of cake and named it after me: not because it's delicious, but because of the amount of fat in it. FML

#7354557
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29411) - you deserved it (5062)

On 01/15/2010 at 6:37am - love - by Jumja (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, my friends let me win at strip poker so I wouldn't take off my clothes. FML

#7293209
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30458) - you deserved it (5753)

On 01/12/2010 at 12:42am - misc - by Absent - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18075) - you deserved it (5070)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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