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bellamcruz's favorite FMLs
by BedazzledAlpaca / 12/08/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend made me a milkshake. It was pale yellow with some black spots. He told me it was banana and poppy seed. After drinking it, he told me they weren't poppy seeds. They were his pubes. FML
by pubemilkshake / 12/07/2014 at 9:12pm / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML
by oh shit / 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/22/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Florida) / Health
by sickmom / 01/21/2014 at 6:07am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids
by kyyle / 01/10/2014 at 11:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML
by ConfusedDad / 12/29/2013 at 2:01am / United States / Kids
by sammers27 / 12/19/2013 at 8:48am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by Jen_NM / 12/16/2013 at 1:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by ElephantLover / 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by hi Mum / 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I told my husband it would be great to spend an evening with a bottle of wine and a pile of blankets on the balcony of our cabin during the cruise. He decided it would be great to ditch me and go out gambling. FML
by Neglected / 12/11/2013 at 2:06pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by scared shitless / 12/10/2013 at 4:50am / United States (California) / Work
by BabeWithBrains / 12/08/2013 at 2:01pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love
- Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, I've been living in Germany for several weeks now. My classmates still cannot pronounce my…