Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

beezerbnt00

Search for a member

beezerbnt00

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3547
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

beezerbnt00's page activity

Visits<b>T2R</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 1:48pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 1:27am<b>iseyixes</b> - the 11/22/2012 at 2:40pm

beezerbnt00's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of beezerbnt00's badges

beezerbnt00's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

#4715
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41366) - you deserved it (5092)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Bear - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I woke up with the worst hangover of my life. My best friend comes over and informs me that I had sex with my girlfriend's two best friends last night. Awesome! Then I realized her best friends are guys. FML

#4044
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8449) - you deserved it (41046)

On 01/31/2009 at 9:43am - intimacy - by Ah hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found my drunken roommate asleep in my bed, naked, after he'd peed himself. FML

#3934
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22904) - you deserved it (1398)

On 01/30/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by shit - United States (New York)

Today, I brought a girl home from the bar. After sleeping together, she drunkenly stumbles to the bathroom to wash up. On her way back, she accidentally walks into my parents' room, turns on the lights and asks where her clothes are before figuring it out. FML

#2426
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6351) - you deserved it (26876)

On 01/24/2009 at 11:07am - love - by Jebus - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to Target to buy some soap and this 65-70 year old woman next to me was asking a sales associate if they had any bubble bath mix. I suddenly pictured her naked, bathing herself and suddenly my dick just couldn't sit still. It's probably because I haven't had sex in over 22 months. FML

#2281
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24607) - you deserved it (10052)

On 01/23/2009 at 3:36am - intimacy - by fecurtis - United States (Virginia)

Today, I am down to 3 euros. My mother just stole the last two euros from me. I asked what she needed them for? Condoms. My mother can have safe sex. I can't buy lunch tomorrow. FML

#1998
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27694) - you deserved it (1591)

On 01/21/2009 at 6:22am - intimacy - by theDiva - Malta

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was gay and that he is in love with my younger brother. FML

#1554
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41089) - you deserved it (2303)

On 01/18/2009 at 7:41am - love - by Wenny - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML

#725
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25924) - you deserved it (1713)

On 01/07/2009 at 6:43am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

#689
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18974) - you deserved it (6903)

On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version

Today, I received a text message from my girlfriend saying: "Do you remember last time we slept together?", I answer straight away "Of course I do, it was great!". To which she replies: "I hope you made the most of it: it was the last". FML

#676
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23985) - you deserved it (2079)

On 01/02/2009 at 12:37am - love - by Godmish - Sent from mobile version

Today, me and my sister hear a buzzing noise in our parent's bedroom. We go to investigate. It's coming from a drawer. We open it up. Battery operated dildo. FML

#770
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29818) - you deserved it (4313)

On 01/01/2009 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my wife and I both have blond hair and blue eyes, we just had a red headed son. FML

#767
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (5620)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:45pm - kids - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend told me in a very natural way that my mother is better at sex than me. FML

#452
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69050) - you deserved it (3756)

On 12/05/2008 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Mak1 - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, my girlfriend came home with new condoms: Manix Endurance containing a numbing gel designed to help me "last longer". FML

#359
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31436) - you deserved it (9135)

On 11/21/2008 at 11:03pm - intimacy - by CoCo - Sent from mobile version

Today, at work, I received an email telling me that viewing porn websites was prohibited and was a good enough reason to fire me. FML

#285
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7079) - you deserved it (57741)

On 11/12/2008 at 2:53am - work - by bipbip - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: