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beaglegal

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beaglegal
  • Town/Country : NJ, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 314
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About beaglegal : Sims and Sherlock. That's it.

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beaglegal's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50201) - you deserved it (13069)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47783) - you deserved it (3183) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML

#20519764
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28526) - you deserved it (3190)

On 02/24/2013 at 2:53am - misc - by cls_x (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

#20499722
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30259) - you deserved it (4248)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

#20489402
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54816) - you deserved it (3255)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17229) - you deserved it (4888)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML

#20440379
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10626) - you deserved it (38790)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24265) - you deserved it (2423)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML

#20120590
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18888) - you deserved it (3430) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)

Today, my doctor informed me that the pea-sized bump under my arm is a "third breast". That is not what I meant every time I said I wanted more tits. FML

#20072637
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17087) - you deserved it (1474)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:07am - health - by Leashaness (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that if a guy you've been dating starts acting weird, there's probably a reason why. Like, perhaps, a wife and two kids. FML

#20050674
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26495) - you deserved it (2486)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:02am - love - by yonanon - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home from work to find my kids playing Frisbee with my collection of rare, valuable vinyl records. The term "smash hit record" took on a whole new meaning. FML

#19488464
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21030) - you deserved it (2135)

On 04/18/2012 at 2:57am - kids - by ChampionshipVinyl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter told me that when she dies, she'd like her ashes spread on her laptop. FML

#19475890
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16984) - you deserved it (2117)

On 04/15/2012 at 11:10pm - kids - by sigh (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML

#19421919
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82664) - you deserved it (4004)

On 04/07/2012 at 4:20am - love - by ladylarni - Australia

Today, I was learning to drive a stick when a cop decided to pull me over just to laugh at me. FML

#19327826
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19599) - you deserved it (2744)

On 03/22/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by Chey - United States (California)



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