Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

beaglegal

Online | Search for a member

beaglegal

1Liked!

beaglegal
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1847
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

About beaglegal : Youtube, Supernatural and Sherlock. That's it.

beaglegal's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - one hour ago<b>MrFluff</b> - 24 hours ago<b>StupidlyCute</b> - yesterday at 4:48pm<b>fabricio_12345</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:29pm<b>amdraxx</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:53pm<b>weak_boy</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:22pm<b>predator0309</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 9:24am<b>HeadlessSparrow</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 6:30am<b>jainam</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:01am<b>Erqoza</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:21am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:06am<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 2:42am<b>IAMKDI</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 2:14am<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 2:03am<b>DazeCat</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:55am<b>leptical</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm<b>Noah197099</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:19pm<b>Jackimo98</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:27pm

Liked!<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 9:22pm

beaglegal's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of beaglegal's badges

beaglegal's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

#21318538
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21439) - you deserved it (2123)

On 12/16/2014 at 1:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my colleague and I played yet another wonderful game of 'Tapeworm or Toilet Paper?' in the homeless shelter's toilets we were asked to clean. FML

#21270023
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29171) - you deserved it (3351)

On 10/03/2014 at 7:29am - work - by whydoidothis (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30111) - you deserved it (3822)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40935) - you deserved it (25776)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22342) - you deserved it (36540)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46669) - you deserved it (7006)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

#21159254
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60143) - you deserved it (8485)

On 06/01/2014 at 11:51am - intimacy - by help me - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52097) - you deserved it (4710)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

#21088237
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42603) - you deserved it (5853)

On 03/16/2014 at 3:28pm - health - by thanksdad (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52016) - you deserved it (6555)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

#21081555
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42544) - you deserved it (4264)

On 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was shopping, when a man pointed at me and said to his friend, "Her. She's the one." He replied, "Yes, she'll do fine." I'm scared. FML

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

#21061692
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52570) - you deserved it (7842)

On 02/15/2014 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54602) - you deserved it (6722)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

#21019190
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45325) - you deserved it (14160)

On 01/06/2014 at 3:57pm - misc - by Mels (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: