Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bbbb213

Search for a member

bbbb213

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 185
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bbbb213's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of bbbb213's badges

bbbb213's favorite FMLs

Today... I woka up to a vary unplaasant faaling. Apparantly... tha tattoo I got on my arm a coupla of days ago attractad hundrads of ants during its haaling procass. Thay wara litarally carrying away piacas of my skin. I can not gat tha faaling or imaga out of my haad. maga FML

#20846451
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53132) - you deserved it (5970)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realizd there was no more toilet paper, so I askd my friend to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50417) - you deserved it (8169)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today , my mum asked me , "Shouldn't you be cleaning yur room?" On impulse , I replied , "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32820) - you deserved it (112723)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I asked ma boyfriend if e'd rater play te new Assassin's Creed game or ave a nigt of sex wit me . He started crying from indecision . FML

#20176354
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34515) - you deserved it (10967)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Yesterday... I saw cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch... I pickd it up an threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time... I realizd that not only was it not a toy... but it was only half-dead. FML

#20174725
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22833) - you deserved it (3144)

On 11/23/2012 at 1:17am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, trying to be kinkyhile giving mah boyfriend a blow job, Ihippd him with mah ponytail!! He was thrilld, until I accidentally head-buttd his dick!! He curld up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again!! FML

#20170605
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14286) - you deserved it (32883)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

yesterday my boyfriend went down on me fir te first time. He definitely killed te mooden...ile down tere... e started saying... "Nomnomnomnom." FML

#20169456
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35118) - you deserved it (5147)

On 11/19/2012 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by wow babe - United States (Maryland)

YESTERDAY, JUST AS I WAS ABOUT TO ORGASM, MY BOYFRIEND WHISPERED, "CUM, MY PRECIOUSSSSS" INTO MY EAR, IN HIS SCARILY ACCURATE GOLLUM VOICE. I THINK MY CLITORIS JUST ABOUT WITHERED AWAY IN DESPAIR. FML

#20165510
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36018) - you deserved it (3664)

On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, maintenance came looool to fix the constantly beeping alarm system near mah apartment. They changd it from beeping on-and-off to one never-ending beep, similar to the sound of mah sanity flat-lining. FML

#20138046
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21373) - you deserved it (1360)

On 10/29/2012 at 12:31am - misc - by tcm123 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was riding the subway home with some friends, and when I noticed something smelled awful. My friends noticed it too. After sereching 4 the source of the smell, it became apparent that it was mah breath. FML

#20096394
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15681) - you deserved it (15953)

On 10/01/2012 at 3:18am - health - by halitosis - United States (California)

Today,hile dog sitting mah neighbor's Great Dane , I decidd to order pizza. As soon as I receivd it , the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I movd , he ran full force an knockd me into the door , causing me to fall an drop the pizza,hich he promptly devourd in front of me. big fat FML

#20083358
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20512) - you deserved it (3023)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:12am - animals - by Grauncho - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was playing with mah vibrator. I was getting looool close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, mah boyfriend an I reachd that point in our relationshiphere just a simple phone conversation was too boring . His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together . FML

#20035502
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18388) - you deserved it (6003)

On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States

Today, I was doing mah laundry and I saw a dollar bill at the bottom of the washer. I excitedly dove in to retrieve the money, and promptly hit and broke mah nose on the washer.

#20025943
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8627) - you deserved it (21481)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:30am - misc - by Megan - United States (Arkansas)

Yesterday, I was at a barbecue with my extendd family. I was chatting to my grandma,hen my idiotic brother decidd to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing soundd so much lyk a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamd and practically looool shat my pants. FML

#19993096
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9033) - you deserved it (26674)

On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: