Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

barreiroj

Search for a member

barreiroj

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 852
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

barreiroj's page activity

Visits<b>nickn426</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 12:19pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 2:23pm<b>eezila</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 1:27pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 6:56pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 1:29pm<b>kelsorg</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:50am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 12:14pm<b>Kar0</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 6:34pm<b>PewDiePie_Lover</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 12:21am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 11:34am<b>TheManInWhiteXx</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 12:35am<b>Lang88</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 10:28am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 6:41pm<b>KatyLarae</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 12:48am<b>theHIGHroad2</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 11:53am<b>aa1717</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 10:36am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 9:07pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 5:28pm

barreiroj's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of barreiroj's badges

barreiroj's favorite FMLs

Today, in revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego in my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. 5ML

#21038562
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41243) - you deserved it (8146)

On 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm - kids - by limping (man) - Canada

Today, my mum decided that having the flu and being too lazy to go upstairs to the bathroom is a valid excuse to shit in a jug instead. 5ML

#21038402
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39940) - you deserved it (3170)

On 01/24/2014 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my university professor admitted to sometimes just winging it when she's teaching. "Yeah," she said, "sometimes I just don't get this stuff either." No wonder I'm failing. 5ML

#21038371
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41826) - you deserved it (3477)

On 01/24/2014 at 3:33pm - misc - by Profucktardor (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, after a big argument, my girlfriend looked me dead in the eyes and said "I can go the rest of my life without sex, you know." 5ML

#21038360
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45562) - you deserved it (11446)

On 01/24/2014 at 3:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom asked me when I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. Not only was she in the room at the time, I've spent the whole week thinking of ways to break up with her without ending up in the hospital. 5ML

#21038079
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43357) - you deserved it (4857)

On 01/24/2014 at 10:11am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom took a picture of me. All she could say about the picture was, "At least your sister is pretty." 5ML

#21038006
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39056) - you deserved it (3539)

On 01/24/2014 at 7:36am - love - by MH - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I noticed my laptop kept shutting down and the mouse cursor was all over the place, clicking on every folder. I dismantled the entire computer only to notice something in one of my USB drives: the receiver to a wireless mouse my colleague put there earlier to play a prank on me. 5ML

#21037915
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34705) - you deserved it (7462)

On 01/24/2014 at 2:16am - work - by Kenny (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, I was going to have sex, so I went to my basement to get my builder bear that I had stuffed my condoms in. The bear was gone. My dad gave it to charity. 5ML

#21037839
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45218) - you deserved it (16428)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my sister found out that Justin Bieber got arrested and now she won't stop crying. 5ML

#21037837
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43035) - you deserved it (5106)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:28am - misc - by Estee1024 - United States (California)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41632) - you deserved it (4553)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was spending the day at my place. Later on, I walked in while she was making lunch. She had a jar of mayo in her hand, and I joked, "I have some mayo, but it doesn't come from a jar." She had a bluetooth headset on, and was in a call with her father. 5ML

#21037484
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40596) - you deserved it (22358)

On 01/23/2014 at 7:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML

Today, school was out because of snow. My dad walked in my room and shouted "Why are you home?!" I told him why, and he replied, "Then get out the damn house and play in the snow." He tossed me out in nothing but my shorts. FML

#21037332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36853) - you deserved it (4636)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, and for the past week, my dog started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML

#21037288
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43817) - you deserved it (9913)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by fappy dog - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 years told me that since I've proven my loyalty and faithfully stuck by his side, he has no reason to ever consider marrying me, because "It's not like you're going anywhere, honey." He seems not to understand why I am upset by this. FML

#21037274
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48001) - you deserved it (5045)

On 01/23/2014 at 3:57pm - love - by heartbrokenhaley - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: