Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

barneystinson555

Search for a member

barneystinson555

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 April 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1055
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About barneystinson555 : FML

barneystinson555's page activity

Visits<b>swarm20</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:27pm<b>Airman1988</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 1:47am<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/13/2012 at 12:12am<b>chris3113</b> - the 01/09/2012 at 11:31pm<b>jesseecuh</b> - the 01/07/2012 at 8:00pm<b>slim_lady</b> - the 12/30/2011 at 6:51am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 12/28/2011 at 3:28am<b>Awesomeness44</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 6:08pm<b>The_Troller</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 7:35pm

barneystinson555's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of barneystinson555's badges

barneystinson555's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML

#15635738
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10854) - you deserved it (39863)

On 04/04/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Username - United States (Kansas)

Today, I wanted to propose to my girlfriend, so I bought M and M's which I had customized with the words "Will you marry me?" on them. She ate them all without reading them. FML

#14895043
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41801) - you deserved it (13712)

On 02/08/2011 at 11:57am - love - by Username - United States (Nevada)

Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML

#14391012
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38037) - you deserved it (6773)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

#14377824
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41017) - you deserved it (4068)

On 12/29/2010 at 2:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

#14368305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27423) - you deserved it (9912)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

#14368305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27423) - you deserved it (9912)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

#14368305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27423) - you deserved it (9912)

On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I went to the library to pick up Romeo and Juliet, for my English class. After looking around for half an hour, I asked the librarian. "I couldn't find Shakespeare anywhere. Where could I find him?" She quickly replied "He's dead", giggled to herself, and went back to her work. FML

#13599206
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25980) - you deserved it (8402)

On 10/26/2010 at 3:48am - misc - by skippy_liz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work, I was trying to repeat an order back to this guy, when his drunk girlfriend started to interrupt me. Whenever I would open my mouth, she would say "Blah blah blah." Literally. Eventually, I gave up. I got his order wrong, and got yelled at by my manager for not repeating his order. FML

#13456460
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26593) - you deserved it (2684)

On 10/15/2010 at 6:52am - work - by ziatenaj - United States (California)

Today, my boss told me that if I didn't become his neighbor on Farmville I wouldn't have a job. I laughed. He didn't. FML

#8687121
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30307) - you deserved it (2561)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:07am - work - by Anon - United States

Today, I was brushing my teeth when I felt a lump of something in the corner of my mouth. Naturally assuming it would be a bit of food that my toothbrush had dislodged, I spat it out into the sink. It was a woodlouse. FML

#8611277
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28468) - you deserved it (2866)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:58am - misc - by puzzled (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

#7278236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25782) - you deserved it (3102)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up lying on the ground outside with a horrible headache. I camped out in my tree house last night. FML

#6710619
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23905) - you deserved it (9231)

On 12/11/2009 at 4:55pm - misc - by B-Man (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up and found that someone had taken a dump on my car. They'd apparently felt bad about it, as they'd then keyed "sorry" into the door. FML

Today, my girlfriend decided we are ready for the next step in our relationship. Apparently that next step is her taking a dump with the door open. FML

#6540223
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35543) - you deserved it (4544)

On 11/30/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by Cpm (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: