barfcannon

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/23/2015 at 10:57pm)

barfcannon

22Fucked!

barfcannonbarfcannon
  • Town/Country : London, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 21 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3622
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About barfcannon : I am into mythology, surrealism, geometry, home décor, winter, animals, yoga and art + art history.

Some of my more mainstream interests are Harry Potter, Family Guy, Adventure Time, Game of Thrones, the first 10 seasons of The Simpsons and freaking sweet puns.

Also I always thought I was a practical sort of person but seeing basically all my interests listed out confirms everyone else's opinions that I'm a huge flaky dreamer.

All my friends moved out of my city after college so I'm in need of more friends in my life so send me a message! I swear I'm not as pretentious as my interests make me sound!

barfcannon's page activity

Visits<b>AlphaPrince13</b> - the 09/05/2016 at 11:56pm<b>SpaceToast</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 1:29am<b>panda900</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 9:26pm<b>SouL_WraitH</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:42pm<b>Standupmast3r</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 2:33pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 8:52am<b>cmchappy</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 5:03pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 1:55am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 4:19am<b>LittleAlice92</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:53pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 6:32am<b>NotRussian</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 1:09am<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 5:20pm<b>UserOfTheMind</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 12:33am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:22pm<b>360momkeycrash</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:49am<b>Xx3rdBASSxX</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:26am<b>MeltedBrain</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 1:24pm

Fucked!<b>SpaceToast</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 7:30am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 2:53pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 2:16am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 9:53am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:56pm<b>int15</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:26pm<b>elusiveshame</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 7:47pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:47pm<b>jacky75</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 7:22am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 4:42am<b>cdncw</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 5:02pm<b>pks2014</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 2:41am<b>RA91</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 8:52am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:42pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 4:11am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 3:29am<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 12:34am<b>brittaaany_93</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 8:10am

barfcannon's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of barfcannon's badges

barfcannon's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

by ifeeldirty / 10/27/2011 at 8:22am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

by margelover / 10/11/2011 at 3:06pm / Denmark (Nordjylland) / Intimacy

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

by jesus christ / 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm / United States / Kids

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I had diarrhea at work. While trying to be subtle about the noises, the woman in the stall next to me called me by name and asked if I was having trouble. FML

by Username / 07/11/2011 at 1:42pm / United States / Health

Today, I looked out my window to see the sunset, but instead I see my neighbor dancing with strobe lights on and music blasting. He was by himself and had absolutely nothing on. FML

by danam / 07/04/2011 at 10:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

by 8sq / 06/10/2011 at 9:32pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

by / 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm / United States / Health

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

by Toothy / 04/02/2011 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2011 at 3:09am / France / Animals

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

by Laura / 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm / Kids

Today, my best friend was fired from the place we both work at because she's a bad employee. After they fired her she said, "If I go, I'm taking my best friend with me." So they fired me too. I actually liked that job. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2010 at 3:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I noticed that my wife changed her status on Facebook to "widow" and a lot of strange guys commented saying stuff like "Finally." Last I checked, I'm not dead. FML

by Alex / 10/07/2010 at 6:10am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML

by RosesAreRed / 02/14/2010 at 1:52pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML